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'Piranha 3D' hopes to take bite out of 3D craze
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3D is everywhere these days and soon it’ll be keeping you out of the water. Alexandre Aja who directed the thoroughly unnecessary remake of “The Hills Have Eyes” is remaking Joe Dante’s “Piranha.” The original, with a screenplay by John Sayles, co-writer of Dante’s werewolf standout, “The Howling,” is a genuine guilty pleasure, a B-movie classic.
According to IMDb, the remake is about what happens when: “A tremor under the surface of Lake Victoria unleashes scores of prehistoric piranhas, an event which rallies the local sheriff (Elizabeth Shue) who will risk everything to save her townsfolk.” Sounds like a fresh water “Jaws,” which might not be so bad.
Elizabeth Shue, best remembered for "Adventures in Babysitting," "Back to the Future," and "Leaving Las Vegas," is due for a comeback. A genuine casting coup for the movie is Richard Dreyfuss, who costarred in the original "Jaws" opposite the late Roy Scheider and Robert Shaw.
Aja has co-written the remake himself with Josh Stolberg and Pete Goldfinger, who wrote the recent remake of “Sorority Row,” who co-wrote Aja’s “The Hills Have Eyes” remake. They’re putting themselves up against pretty illustrious company. Sayles’ credits include numerous B’s, some of them classics like “The Howling,” “The Lady in Red,” “Alligator” and the original “Piranha,” in addition to the indy classic, “Return of the Secaucus Seven,” which he also directed, “The Brother From Another Planet,” “Eight Men Out,” “The Secret of Roan Inish,” “Lone Star” and “The Spiderwick Chronicles.” He did an uncredited rewrite on “Apollo 13.”
Some new stills have just been released from the remake, which opens April 16, 2010.
The cast includes Elizabeth Shue, Richard Dreyfuss, Jerry O’Connell, Ving Rhames, Dina Meyer and Kelly Brook. Adult video star Riley Steele is also featured.
The new version is going to feature CGI carnivorous fishies (as if there was any other kind). In the original, shots of the title characters attacking victims were done by gluing rubber fish to prosthetic limbs, putting them underwater, then yanking them off while filming in reverse gear (which frankly looked pretty good).
No getting around it, 3D is providing Hollywood with reasons to remake or sequel movies that there would be no other reason to touch. The long-delayed horror movie “The Cabin in the Woods” has been pushed back an entire year to convert it to 3D. The next “Resident Evil” movie is also being filmed in 3D. "Saw VII" is reportedly going to be made in 3D. No less a talent than JJ Abrams is openly speculating that the next “Star Trek” movie may be filmed in 3D. Then there's James Cameron's "Avatar," which may be the most expensive movie ever made, which features tons of CGI imagery and was filmed in 3D.
Which is all well and good, if that’s what the audiences want, and they probably will, for awhile. Thing is, you don’t have a story to tell, it doesn’t matter what jumps off the screen. This is a lesson Hollywood learns the hard way every so often.
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