First Time Author Examiner - The Science of the First Sentence

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POSTED May 13, 1:27 PM

The cover of a book is its first impression on the reader. We always judge books somewhat on their covers, despite the old adage. But your first sentence is just as important.

It's like meeting a really beautiful person. Your first impression is generally favorable simply because that's how our brains are wired. Yet it's not until they open their mouths that our opinion is fully formed.

That's because the cover and the first sentence work as a team. One brings physical allure, the other intrigue and substance.

Which is why it's critically important that your first sentence be interesting, gripping and above all else, short. Author Elmore Leonard has complied his own list of rules for writers. While I find most of them completely abhorrent or just down-right silly, he has one that I agree with: Never start with the weather.

That's true, if not for the reasons he presents. (My next post will be picking apart the mess he's trying to create in the aspiring writer's head, so forgive further silence on the matter until tomorrow).

The reason you don't start with the weather is because it takes too much space. You can describe the weather, briefly, in the first page if you like. Nothing wrong with it in the world if it makes sense in your context.

But what really grips a reader is action. A short, immediate statement that something has just happened. You don't generally want to begin by explaining everything the reader needs to know about the characters and the setting. Let that come out in their actions, their speech and the way they use or are affected by their environment.

Rather, use the first line to convey action. It's far more exciting if the reader enters the story in the middle of something happening. It doesn't have to be a huge, climactic event. But don't start by saying, "Well, in about 20 pages things will get moving, but for now let's explore the way the wind is moving through the flowers that lead across the garden path towards the manor house."

Instead, think about having a character pick one of the aforementioned flowers. Let the character's unique perspective shine through the way he/she views the flower, or their reasoning for picking it.

This might be the worst example I've ever provided, but I'm trying to be as genre-neutral as possible. So let's go with it just a moment longer and then you can play with it on your own terms and see if this makes sense for you.

Compare, as first sentences go, these two, based on the example. Keep in mind that all the exposition and explanation you need can be provided in sentences 2, 3, 4, 2591, etc.:

"The summer breeze breathed across the orange blossoms, carrying with it the faint memory of spring and alluding to the ready embrace of a new Savannah morning."

vs.

"The stem snapped."

The second can then be followed by an introduction of the first character you meet. Simply by adding something about his/her name and what he/she was doing outside...which can lead to their thoughts on their mother, or dog or whatever.

The Bottom Line: In a novel, you have all the space in the world to talk about whatever you like. It might not always be gold, but you don't have to cram everything the reader needs to know into the first line. Yank them in, then gently reassure them that they're somewhere they want to be.

Categories: Writing , Author , Novel , Creativity , First Lines

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Guy Incognito
Got a manuscript? So does Guy - a great one, or so say his editors. Follow along as he shares the experience of writing and publishing a book with you from manuscript to book tours and, hopefully, sequels.