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Coping with the loss of loved ones
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Our lives are so full of changes and intricate mazes of emotions. Death is one of the realities of life and it never seems to get easier.
While celebrating my love's birthday recently, he said "your phone is ringing off the hook, I think there's a family emergency." My heart fell because I know what that usually means. After scanning the missed calls in my phone, my hesitancy was overtaking me; I almost ignored it all. I made the call to my youngest daughter first, only to hear her frantic voice saying "Ma, Auntie Verne died." My first response was "what do you mean DIED?" In my heart I knew, my sister was gone.
One of the worst realizations I came to was the unfinished business. I was instantly regretful that I hadn't seen her face-to-face after a family feud. This happens in alot of families, and the same holds true: what do you do with the guilt?
Guilt from a loved one's death doesn't go away quite so easily. I've found a few ways to cope with the feelings I'm still experiencing:
a. Daily prayer and meditation (this helps me by keeping my ego out of that relationship with my sister)
b. Avoiding spending too much time alone, reflecting on what could've been done differently
c. Remembering the loving times we had as a family and holding on to joy
I learned what not to do by doing the wrong thing in the first place. Be well.
