Therapy in Three Minutes: Cougar on the prowl

August 24, 10:00 AMRelationship Advice ExaminerKeith Swain, PsyD

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Sexy Mama?

Dear Dr. Swain, I am a 45-year-old woman – single, (formerly married) – with one teenage daughter. Here’s my problem: my daughter is embarrassed by my open expression of my sexuality. She feels that I should be chaste, or at least keep my mouth shut about my sexual interests in men. She also thinks it’s wrong for me to be interested in young men, men her age – but honestly, they’re the best at sex. I’m not looking for love, just a great time in the sack! Am I wrong or is my daughter just hung up? Thanks. Hot Atlanta Mama

Well, Hot Mama, I can see both sides of your story – your need to be a fulfilled sexual being and your daughter’s desire for a bit of discretion. And I suppose that is what it all comes down to: discretion. Few of us what to be fully aware of our parent’s sexual lives, but at the same time, there is no reason for you to not be enjoying a full and active sex life at your age and given your current situation. The best advice I can give you is to simply tone down the discussion of your sexual interests and then tone down any obvious behaviors that reveal your sexual appetite while in the company of your daughter. When she’s not around – go for it and enjoy it! You might find this column of help – the Cougar Lifestyle.