Managing stress and creating a life you can live

November 17, 12:46 AMSF Grandparenting ExaminerCatherine Al-Meten

What is stress?  Stress is a natural part of life. It signals our body of an impending threat. Stress is our body's way of responding to physical, emotional or mental demands.  While it serves a number of positive purposes, too much stress can have negative consequences on our overall health.  How much stress is too much?  What can be done to deal with feeling overwhelmed or out of balance? Learn to identify stress and how you react to stress. Discover ways to manage life more effectively.

Paying attention to stress: Each of us experiences stress differently. What is upsetting to you may not be disturbing to someone else.  Stress management varies depending upon  personality and Individual needs. There is no one best way to handle stress, but there are ways to become more aware of stress responses. You can learn to cope with stress more effectively.  Types of stress fall into different categories:

• Emotional reactions: moodiness, sadness, anger, irritability, restlessness, depression, loneliness, numbness, or feeling overwhelmed;
  
• Physical symptoms: loss of libido, exhaustion, diarrhea, constipation, nausea, dizziness, somatic aches and pains (stomach aches, headaches), rapid heart beat or muscle pain. Frequent colds and illness are also symptomatic of stress;
• Behavioral symptoms: inability to sleep,sleeping too much, dependence on alcohol, drugs, cigarettes, nervous habits (nail biting, lip chewing), avoiding  responsibilities, isolation. poor personal hygiene, loss of appetite or overeating;
  
• Cognitive reactions: inability to focus,  memory problems, negativity, poor judgment, worry, anxiety, and racing and intrusive thoughts.

Stress symptoms may overlap and vary at different times of life.  These symptoms can also be symptoms of more serious problems.  

Creating a life you can live.  You can manage the stress for more optimum health.  Paying attention to your own body’s reactions and responses is a good place to start. Begin today creating habits, attitudes, and behavior to help you live in greater harmony. 

•  Do a self appraisal.   What causes you stress? How do you normally deal with stress? What causes you to lose energy or experience other symptoms of stress? Narrowing down the sources of stress is helpful in addressing the causes of stress.. 
  
• Develop a dailly practice of presence.   Meditate, pray, or simply be still and pay attention to what your body, mind and emotions tell you. 
  Notice pain, stress, tension, or anxiety.  Notice your thoughts.  Notice your feelings.   Identifying the source of your stress helps in learning how to manage it.

• Build self-care into your schedule.  Schedule time for yourself.  As you schedule meetings, appointments or other tasks, schedule time for yourself.

• Develop an exercise routine you can stick with.  Exercise every day. Walk, swim, run, attend an exercise class, or shoot some hoops.  Just 20 minutes a day make a difference. With intention, spend time getting exercise and fresh air every day. Vary your routine so you will enjoy and look forward to taking care of yourself.

• Step out of yourself and do something for someone else.  One of the best ways to stop worrying about your own problems is to help someone else solve theirs.The "29 gifts in 29 days" is a good exercise. Give someone a gift every day for 29 days.  A smile, a letter, a helping hand, recycle goods to Goodwill, your time to the library, nursing home, hospital, or local school.  Bake someone a birthday cake.  Sweep off your neighbors porch when they're away. Whatever you do, do it with intention. Being kind releases positive energy into your world.

• Have fun.   Find ways to enjoy yourself. Do something you enjoy (a hobby, listening to music, going out dancing) or just hae a good laugh with a friend. Smile and laugh more.

• Do things in littles.  Have a paper due? Studying for a test? Need to get the house cleaned up? Overscheduled? Is your desk piled high? Does life seem to be out-of-control?  Stop and create a way to deal with one thing at a time.  Prioritize according to what is urgent: needs to be done by the end of the hour/day/week/month/year.  Make a list or chart so you can see what's next and what's done.  Then do just one thing.  Then another.  If your goal is to clean the house, start with one drawer or the top of the kitchen table.  

• Declutter and organize your life.  Get rid of the clutter in your life. Try Feng Shui or the I Hate to Housekeep Book by Peg Bracken. Work your way through your purse, your house your car, your office, or your garage, and see how much better you feel.  Living Beautifully by Alexandra Stoddard is a great book I use it to arrange my home into my refuge. 

• Be discerning in your relationships.  Look at your relationships, and ask yourself, "Which relationships are draining me? Which relationships are abusive? Which relationships are over and done with?"  Then ask, "Which relationships nurture me? Which ones are mutual and healthy?" Take care of who you spend your time and life with.

• Change your attitude and change your life.  Listen to how you talk to yourself.  Notice your attitude as you talk to others. Develop a positive attitude, and change the things you can change; learn to live with the rest.  Joseph Murphy's The Power of the Subconscious Mind is a great book to get started in understanding how powerfully our thinking affects our lives. 

• Allow for the unexpected.   Not everything is predictable, nor does everything run according to plan.  Clean up your thoughts, attitudes, house, relationships, and life, and then set sail.  Allow life to unfold without your complete control.  You might be pleasantly surprised. Even some of the worst experiences, open doors for new and surprisingly good new starts.

• Give yourself permission to say "no" more often.  Need I say more?

Trust yourself to create ways to build harmony and balance into your life. Why not make your own list of how you already effectively manage  stress in your life? Live by your own Truth and enjoy creating a life you can live with.