Structured bi poly sexuality or to swing or not to swing

November 9, 8:01 PMNY Bisexual Relationships ExaminerJon Thomas

Previous Next

Comment Print Email RSS Subscribe

Subscribe

Get alerts when there is a new article from the NY Bisexual Relationships Examiner. Read Examiner.com's terms of use.

Email Address   Include other special offers from Examiner.com Terms of Use

Entrance to BlindPassion Lifestyle's Bisexual Neighborhood.
Jon Thomas

“Sexuality in the lifestyle is a beautiful thing.  A place where we can explore without the taboo factors creeping in. I was always attracted to other women, but not until I put myself in the situation to explore my feelings did I have the opportunity to know how much I enjoyed making love to another woman.”

“While I was in my younger days I had some bisexual experiences with other men. Most of them were only oral on the receiving end.  As time went by I have to admit I fantasized about being with men while masturbating. When the wife and I first got into the lifestyle she realized she was bisexual and I strongly admitted I was straight.

At a local party we had a few couples back to our room and had a group activity going. While playing with everyone my hand reached out and found a cock in my grip. I have to admit it felt great!  The cock excited me.  Later I passed this person while going to the bathroom and found myself reaching out to grab his cock again.

Unfortunately another couple was in the room as were a couple of straight males, so I was afraid to explore my new found excitement with the man who didn’t mind me touching his cock. Soon enough the straight people left and we found ourselves with the man whose cock I touched and his wife, who we already knew was bi. My wife started to give head to the man, and I found myself joining in. Wow, I couldn’t believe, here I am sucking a cock with my wife and I’m enjoying it!

I didn't know what my wife was thinking as I sucked the man’s cock with her.  I had seen her with women plenty of times, but this was the first time she saw me with another man.  A short time later, I found myself being sucked by the same man.  Instinctually, I soon turned over sticking my ass in the air hoping I may get rimmed. The next thing I know I'm feeling his hard cock slide deep into my ass.  I have been penetrated with a toy by my wife, but this was nothing like it.

I found myself pushing backwards shoving his cock deep inside me.  I then discovered I could flex my ass muscles as my ass stroked his cock, and within seconds I could feel him coming as I myself came explosively.  The next morning while driving home from the hotel my wife looked at me and said, "You know what, you’re bi"!

The next couple we played with had a straight male. I had found myself wanting to play with his cock, but knew this would not be possible.  This put a damper on the whole evening knowing that I really couldn't enjoy myself the way I wanted to.  Afterwards we discussed it, and decided that the only couples we would play with would be bi couples.”



Balance and responsibility are always important.

With married bisexual couples and bisexual couples in long-term relationships the “rules of engagement” are even more important when they consider participating in ethical non monogamy. Each partner needs to know what they can and cannot do without violating the “boundaries of trust” in their relationship.

Equally important is the couple’s modus operandi or method of fulfilling their bisexual needs. Some couples choose to be faithful to each other, but many other couples choose to improvise or ad lib leaving how they meet other bi singles or bicouples up to chance.

Other couples take more control by enrolling in an online social network that specifically caters to other like-minded members. Within this structure bisexuals can search for and connect with other play partners when they feel like it.

Most of these social networks are purely sexual in nature.  They are called “Swinger” or “Lifestyle” clubs that have a discreet bisexual constituency. Other social networks are more progressive and less obviously sexual with open bi communities or bi groups that specifically cater to bisexuals. 

In these neighborhoods bisexuals can play with new partners or couples one after the other, play with several partners at the same time, play with their partners all together, create long-term poly relationships or just socialize with each other. They can share everything for parenting to sports and create new subgroups to accommodate their common interests be they sexual or social.

Not all bisexuals are young. Bisexual neighborhoods often give older people the opportunity to explore the extent of their bisexual feelings. “It is sexually gratifying to be desired and touched by either a man or a woman and able to react without regard to gender taboos and restrictions,” one gentleman said in a bisexual group consisting of couples over 40. “Most bisexuals live as straights or gays and are late bloomers coming from former straight marriages or gay relationships, who mostly never acted on their bisexual feelings until years later when the kids were out of the house, after the divorce, separation, retirement, or relocation. It is good to have a place where you can meet people and connect with them to explore your new sexuality without fear.”

“For the first time in my life I feel balanced like a responsible adult,” the man’s wife confessed as she turned away from her husband.

“For the first time, I feel whole.”