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The NYU Plague
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As some of you may have noticed, last week I didn't publish an article. Why you ask? Well, if you haven't caught on by the title, I managed to get that nasty little bug floating around our campus I have affectionately dubbed 'the plague.' The following is a play by play account of what happened to me so you know what to do when you get it.
You will get it.
Monday:
Feeling fine! Everyone around me is sick and I am not. Woot! I attribute it to the fact that I am mostly vegan in my eating habits. Also, I seem to have an uncanny and beautiful knack for never catching what everyone else gets. Once, I was in a production with nine other women who all either had strep or mono and I walked away from the show squeaky clean.
Tuesday:
I have taken note of a slight tickle in my throat. Maybe if I ignore it, it will go away. Staying home from Modern Russian Directors. Scared for what may take place in studio tomorrow. French test in the morning, must survive until I take it and prove how glorious I am at absorbing languages I've never been exposed to.
Wednesday:
Painful to wake up. Everything hurts and my head feels like it has gained about thirty pounds. Could be from all the French that I studied but I think not. I have clearly caught the plague.
Later: Had to come home from studio. I started shaking and feeling dizzy. Took a hot bath and this seems to have angered the demon I now believe possesses me. Must call Sam and Dean Winchester of the show so that they may excercise me...Heh. I keep difting in and out of really really hot sleep and making strange noises. The roomate is being a good sport and ignoring them. Has also forced me to imbibe children's Dimetapp of the grape variety. As someone who hates cough syrup, I must say that's it's not bad. Oh look, a unicorn.
Later still: Took a tepid shower to try and break the fever. Was in there for forty-five minutes sitting in the tub (couldn't stand) lamenting because I promised my French class some after test bananna bread. Must make it to French.
Thursday:
The high levels of Dimetapp in my system have caused me to believe that my toothbrush plots against me. Still not ready to go back to MRD. Slept for most of the day.
Friday:
Feeling much better just in time for the impending existential angst that is Valentine's Day. I have survived the plague; I am victorius.
Saturday:
Found a still pulsating human heart withing a chocolate candy box. Suspect I am next. Another article for another day.
Note: Do not take Sudafed unless you like feeling really sick and really high at the same time. Also, don't eat pills just lying around. Learnt thatun thur the hard way.
Note 2: If you're wondering why I didn't go to the health center, it's because all they do look in your ears, take your pulse, and tell you to buy Mucinex. Every. Single. Time. You could have shingles and they would prescribe that. A veloceraptor will have bitten off your arm and they will tell you to buy Mucinex. Conspiracy? Also, they ask you if you're preggers regardless of sex or sexual orientation.
Note 3: Pretention clearly brings on the sickness faster and with a vengence. Watch out film students!
Feel better :)
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