RSS
Home
Finding autism’s simple gifts
Print
Email
RSS
Subscribe
Credit: iStockphoto
It is easy to find media coverage exposing the strife, anxiety and emotional and financial toll autism takes on families today. Make no mistake, living with autism and with autism in one’s family can entail – and frequently does include – all of those things. There are also brilliant moments of insight, self-awareness and love as well, which rarely get the spotlight of big media.
They are the simple gifts of autism. A smile. A word. A hug. The flash of understanding that miraculously and spontaneously shows itself. Years ago, when I was on the “outside,” and did not live with autism in my life, such things were trivial; ornaments in our day-to-day living to which I barely paid attention so immersed in the noise of living. I have learned, been forced, to slow down – to filter out the social static around me – and focus on the small and wonderful that had previously so easily escaped my attention.
The day that my son actually came to the table on his own when I called him for dinner, rather than having to pick him up and live through yet another tantrum. The day he began to be able to speak again, after losing his words at two years of age. The day he we able to tell us his favorite color: “rainbow.” The moment he took my face between his hands to hold my head still and just gazed into my eyes, nose-to-nose.
Within our community stories of these simple and extraordinary gifts abound. The mother whose son is throwing, screaming, tantruming for hours, which happens far too regularly. The mother is at her wit’s end, finally sitting at a table and sobbing to herself. The son’s tantrum eventually ends, and he finds his mother and hugs her saying “I’m sorry mommy, I can’t help it, I’m sorry. I love you.”
There’s the experience of a grandmother who worked to explain to her teenage granddaughter with autism what a simple hug means. Step-by-step she tried to explain. First, she hugged her granddaughter, then asked her how it made her feel inside. Her reply was, her heart felt warm and her tummy had butterflies and her body tingled. The grandmother told her that was love and security. Suddenly the granddaughter’s face lit up and her eyes filled with tears and hugged her grandmother, squeezed her tight and said, “Oh Grandma, I got it!”
Those of us with autism in our lives accept these gifts, hold them close and cherish them. They make us look harder at those smaller things and appreciate them more deeply. Learning to see and accept these gifts can open us up further and enrich our appreciation of life.
Brian Field is the co-founder of the Autism Support Network
Related Articles:
Comments
.jpg)
