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Inexcusable support from Relic yet again
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The undeniable kill-all unit that every gamer wants but should never, ever get.
Pretend for a moment that you are a gamer, willing to deal with mountains of BS, loads of malarky, and blatant money-mongering in order to get a game you want.
Even if you are said gamer, you do not deserve to be fed the garbage that is the new patch for Company of Heroes.
Mechanics form the core of gameplay in CoH. Mechanics like how a machine gun can pin only units in front of it, allowing you to sneak up behind it and remove it as a threat. Mechanics like a tank that can pin your infantry only after a certain amount of time, allowing them to fight back with bazookas or explosives.
The new patch has broken these mechanics in a terrible way. Panzer Elite players can (and so far, usually do almost without question) call in a tank that will instantly pin all your infantry at close range the second it fires. Thus, any army made up of infantry (gasp, that happens?) is completely and utterly useless in the presence of 1 tank. Anti-tank infantry, even anti-tank guns crewed by people, are still pinned by this kill-all.
I would be willing to ignore some gameplay bugs if they weren't game-ruining exploits after the company has had an entire year to release the patch that supposedly will fix all our problems. Many users requested of Relic that they release smaller fixes more often, but this strategy apparently didn't make enough sense to them. God forbid you fix one problem at a time and actually test the bloody thing before you shove it down our throats.
Wait, you say. At least it was only a small patch! You could download it quickly enough, seeing as how it's only 100mb, and that goes fast even on DSL. Clearly, the fact that downloading this patch you waited twelve months for (that was released one month before the next expansion, no less, when it was requested maybe nine months before that) within a few minutes is a great deal, right?
Guess again, chump! You were stupid enough to buy CoH on the convieniently organized Steam network, so because Relic decided not to put work into getting their download system to synch up with Steam's, you get to download the entire 1.4gb game again while millions of other users are doing the same thing. Enjoy your download speed (on a 5mb connection) of 60kb, loser!
Clearly, Relic must be at the head of the class for crapping all over players (except of course for EA, but we don't talk about them.) Several game-breaking bugs are present in an overdue patch that has been developed not just by Relic, but by community members as well. Best of all, you get to download your whole game again if you bought it the easy way online rather than installing from a disc. After twelve months of waiting, shame on you, Relic! You should know better than to hurl your faithful audience into the fire like this. Do yourselves a favor and make money by actually giving gamers a good product for once.
