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Every outdoor flip-flopped foot
Must inevitably collect soot.
And since when have filthy feet
Been thought a delightful treat?
Gardening clogs in garish plastic
Induce in wearers a shuffle spastic
Perambulation strangely restricted
That is entirely self-inflicted.
Walking in either may be achievable,
Though running is quite unfeasible.
That's why those who tend to sport 'em
Are thick of trunk and broad of bottom.