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The top ten sexiest songs to boink to
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I'll admit it--I've had some interesting background noises when it comes to coitus. And although the barking dog and Snuggie infomercials did add a sense of novelty, if I'm going to enhance the moment with sound effects I want a song that reaches out from the stereo and gives me an invisible thumbs up. If you want to make love, buy an Enya album, but if you want to get it on then enter this list. And don't forget to add your own sultry suggestions to the comment board (fair warning: all James Taylor song suggestions will be promptly deleted).
You Shook Me All Night Long by ACDC
Who would have thought that a screeching guy in a schoolboy uniform, with the help of some killer guitar chords, could make me so weak in the knees? Raw and delightfully boastful, this song is pure primal pleasure. I’m also proud to say it’s been my cell phone’s ringtone for the last three years.
Sexiest Lyric: “Wanted no applause / Just another course /
Fade Into You by Mazzy Star
An alumni of the “dream pop” genre, this song’s languid pace and sumptuous vocals are like popping Ecstasy without the risk of dancing yourself to death.
Sexiest lyric: "I want to hold the hand inside you / I want to take a breath that's true"
I Touch Myself by the DiVinyls
If you’re going to be a one hit wonder, it doesn’t hurt to create a song so blatantly honest and sexually urgent that it leaves people giddily singing along in their cars to a diddy about the joys of masturbation.
Sexiest lyric: "I love myself, I want you to love me / When I feel down I want you above me"
Don’t Stop by The Rolling Stones
Mick Jagger may not be the face you’d want to stare at during sex, but his voice was blessed by the sexy fairy. This song is all about desperate lust and a haunted heart, but if you choose to get busy to its rocking guitar riffs, you can put a happily-ever-after spin on it.
Sexiest lyric: “Well you bit my lip and drew first blood/ And warmed my cold, cold heart/ And you wrote your name right on my back/ Boy your nails were sharp”
Let’s Get It On by Marvin Gaye
Too obvious? Fine. But don’t tell me the opening chord doesn’t make you want to saunter toward your lover and groove together biblically. At the time of the song’s release, Gaye was reportedly infatuated with a pal's 17 year-old daughter, who was said to be in the studio when the song was recorded. Four years later, they were married with two children. Is there any better proof that this song works?
Sexiest lyric: "You don't have to worry that it's wrong / If the spirit moves you, let me groove you"
Pony by Far
I know it’s not the original, but personally I never cared for the woozy version by Ginuwine where it sounds like a frog is belching in the background. This version however, electrocuted by sharp guitars and husky vocals, is fabulously raw. It’s not for everybody; some may find the alternative rock sound and brash lyrics too hardcore. And rightfully so, because this ain’t a song you make love to: It’s a song you f--- to.
Sexiest lyric: “You and your body, every single portion /
Love To Love You Baby by Donna Summer
With its breathless vocals and crescendo of orgasmic moans, the song According to "research" by the BBC and Time Magazine, the song doesn’t just ooze sex—it douses you in it. According to "research" by the BBC and Time Magazine, Love To Love You Baby contains at least 22 simulated orgasms. Beat that!
Sexiest lyric: "Do it to me again and again / You put me in such a awful spin"
Poison by Alice Cooper
Lust—angry lust—is the topic here, and the singer’s torment is spat out to a high energy rock beat. If your girlfriend a. owns a chihuahua sporting a pink tutu or b. thinks that her Jessica Simpson album is just tops, then putting this song on and expecting to get lovin' may not work.
Sexiest lyric: “I hear you calling and its needles/ And pins (and pins) / I want to hurt you just to hear you screaming my name”
Cradle of Love by Billy Idol
The classic music video featured footage of Idol singing in large frames throughout an apartment while the young and lusty Betsy Lynn George tried to seduce a frightened nerd. But even if you never saw the video, you have to admit that there’s nothing sexier than a rock song exploding with lust—and a classic Billy Idol scream.
Sexiest lyric: “Yeah, flesh for your Romeo/ Oh yeah, baby, I hear you moan”
You Can Leave Your Hat On by Joe Cocker
Let’s face it—Kim Basinger could have been stripping to the Star Spangled Banner in Nine and a Half Weeks and the male audience wouldn’t have cared a bit. But she flirtatiously peeled off her clothes to this jazzy number, and moviegoers everywhere were feeling the heat. I suppose the male equivalent of this song would have been something along the lines of “You Can Leave Your Socks On” or “You Can Hold Your Beercan,” but they just don’t pack the same punch.
Sexiest lyric: “Baby take off your dress/ Yes, yes, yes”
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