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Celebrities aren’t the only ones who get caught with what some call “naughty” photos, the general public can get swept up into it as well. When you’re in a relationship, and you start to trust your partner, that question of “send a sexy photo” tends to come up sooner or later with a lot of regular people.
However, a lot of problems crop up with saying yes or no when people don’t consider a few things. Most of us don’t get into relationships expecting them to end, after all, and the idea someone might “leak” them later to hurt us seems a distant possibility.
When considering taking that photo make sure this person is trustworthy, and despite how painful it might be, know the fact you two might not make it within the month’s end, and it could end badly. A lot of people aren’t cautious enough, especially people with more high profile jobs.
When your partner acts hurt or annoyed about a refusal remind them that they have the real thing and there’s no need to spoil the fantasy with an actual photo in front of them. You two can get creative right in front of each other. If it’s a new relationship, try getting them to wait and see how it weathers out before committing to “naughty” photo or video.
People generally don’t think they need to bother protecting themselves, but the more public a figure they are (or important privately, such as a higher position within a company), the more they need to be, because hackers can always get at pictures and “leak” them for money. So why do it?
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A few reasons a lot of us do it anyway: We miss our loved one, and it helps us feel closer and more intimate with them while we’re away for longer periods of time, or we think it might spice up our love lives if we can look at each other rather than a porn star. Or maybe we were just young and having fun (we all make mistakes). It’s true, these can be valid reasons to keep in mind. It’s a fairly common practice, especially among younger couples, so it’s amazing how quick we’re to condemn someone for a photo. A bikini can show as much as lingerie! (See Adriana Lima in Lingerie vs Adriana Lima in Bikini)
Even if they seem silly when you feel like you’re with the love of your life, some precautions to keep in mind if you do decide you’re both ready:
-If it is a video, make sure you always know how many copies there are, and what they’re on. I don’t advise using a webcam or uploading it on a desktop or online. Keep in on a flash drive, ready to plug in and bring up anytime. Most people’s flash drives are important enough that they keep good track of them because of their general content and portability. (Check out www.geek.com for more information on easily concealed and manageable flash drives.)
-If it is just some “racy” photos, again, keep them on a flash drive you’ll keep track of, and try to take some photos where your face isn’t seen that clearly if you can help it. Sometimes long hair or bangs falling onto your face can look just as sexy, and it helps if later on your boss is pointing at it and wondering if that’s you.
These days, everyone can find a way to look at your facebook photos, and it can make or break someone hiring you. An ex might upload them on theirs and offer to show your company, or just happen to leave their profile open and a link posted where they’ll find it when looking you over for that promotion or job.
-If your loved one wants to see your face, send separate ones from the shoulders up (Try to ensure if you’re wearing recognizable lingerie, try making sure your shoulders are bare; you can always claim you were wearing a tube top! Bare skin is very tantalizing, especially if they can’t see too much. Guys can get away with topless either way). Or try a sexy close-up on the mouth or eyes.
-Don’t name any of your files anything that can be traced back to you, i.e. names (or nicknames), dates, places, or things. Keep all “personal content” like these in one folder with the window set to view as only a list, that way no icon with a thumbnail of you shows up in case someone pops by at the wrong time.
If you have just a second to exit one window of the actual photo, you can rest easy since it’s named something inconspicuous and with no questionable icon when it shows up in the photo folder window in list.
[For more information, or to ask a specific question about this and other relationship questions, don't hesitate to email me at judsonlaw@yahoo.com.]
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