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Going back to work after having a baby
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Going back to work after having a baby is one of the toughest choices a new mother has to make. Consulting all the magazines and books in the world won’t make it any easier, either. Some moms don’t have a choice financially, some moms love what they do so much it would never cross their minds NOT to go back to work, but for the rest of the moms in the middle, it’s hard. There is no right or wrong answer.
All working moms approach the prospect of returning to work differently, but feel basically the same about it. It doesn’t matter what the childcare arrangements are, either. Daycare, in-home daycare, nanny, babysitter, relative, spouse – the first time a mother leaves her child to go back into the working world, she will be devastated to her very core. Here are some Do’s and Don’ts to surviving that first day back to work.
1. Do not bring a photo album to work. It’s time to go back to being a professional. Coworkers generally care most about work product, not personal lives. Save the album for only the closest coworkers and only outside the office.
2. Do expect to cry at least twice. At the most inappropriate times. Hormones are still in play and should not be trusted. Keep a tissue in your pocket and have a few quick blurbs ready to help ease the awkwardness. Sometimes a simple exclamation of “hormones!” will be all that’s necessary.
3. Do accept that you will spend most the day in isolation. It is a difficult transition back into the daily grind. Give it time, and give yourself a break. Your brain isn’t used to functioning in this manner. Take the first day slow, and re-acclimate yourself with your work environment.
4. Do not allow feelings to be unnecessarily hurt. While out on leave, the world did go on, the company did remain open, and coworkers continued to interact. There will be many things you don’t know simply because you weren’t there, not because your coworkers are trying to exclude you.
5. Do ask for face time with the boss. Your focus has perhaps shifted due to the new family addition, but while at work, you are an employee first, and a mom second. The boss needs to be reassured of your commitment to your job. Be sure to comment on progress of projects in your absence and talk through the plan to get yourself re-acquainted with all files.
6. Do bring something for coworkers that covered for you while you were out. Did they hire a temp? If so, take him/her to lunch, bring a plant, a gift certificate, something to say thank you. Did your work get spread out to several people? Maybe bring donuts for the office, send out an email announcing your return and thanking profusely all those that made it possible for you to enjoy your time off. Acknowledge their burden. Personally, if possible.
7. Do not break traffic laws in your rush home. Your baby is there, just waiting for you. Your baby did not even begin to experience the separation anxiety that you did all day. You had a rough time, but you did it. Savor your drive home as a time to reflect on the day. What was good, what was bad, what you look forward to about tomorrow, what you look forward to when you walk through the front door. But most of all, just enjoy a moment of reflection about the new you. You’re a working mom, now. Congratulations and welcome to the club.
For more info: Find a daycare in Dallas at MomCheck. Find a nanny in Dallas and other cities Nationwide at Gonannies. Find articles about balancing work & motherhood at Working Mother.
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