One flu over the swine pen or how I survived the H1N1 virus

November 1, 11:10 AMAlbany CPS and Family Court ExaminerDaniel Weaver

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Swine flu vaccine. (AP Photo/The Canadian Press, Darren Calabrese)

October 28, 2009 Wednesday. Could not bring myself to write anything for www.examiner.com. No mental energy. Wanted to write about the one couple who did not appear for their hearing in Arkansas. Did they go into hiding? Can't say I blame them if they did. I've talked to many others who have done the same when CPS wants to take their baby. Did not connect my mental lassitude with coming down with an illness.

Went to work in the afternoon. Became increasingly depressed as the afternoon wore on--so depressed that dying started to look good.

Went home at 5:00pm and right to bed. Slept off and off all through the evening and into the morning hours.

October 29, 2009 Thursday. Sore throat. Terrific headache. Chills and sweats. Get out of bed and go downstairs and sit in the recliner and doze off an on until 10:00am. Call my son to see if he can run the store today. He can't. Make myself take a shower and feel a tad bit better.

Go to work but spend the whole time just desiring to go home. Thought about putting a note on the door and going home but decided to stick it out. Only had a few customers and kept my distance from them.

Leave at 5:00pm and go home and go right to bed. Temperature up 1.5 degrees. Feel incredibly weak.

Beginning to wonder if this isn't the swine flu because my wife has the same symptoms and she was vaccinated for other flus.

No appetite. Feel dried out. Drink lots of fluid. No desire to read or watch television or do anything. Light cough and feeling of congestion in my chest.

October 30, 2009 Friday. Headache gone. Feel a tad bit better. Go to work but the same thing happens. I can't wait to go home.

In the evening, I feel a little better. Check my email for the first time in more than two days. Don't have the energy to respond to most of it, except for the most pressing.

Tonight I had difficulty sleeping. Sweats and chills about gone, although aches and pains throughout body are still there, with an occasional sharp or stabbing pain. Still no appetite.

October 31, 2009 Saturday. Felt a little better than the last two mornings. Still when I went to package up my orders to ship out, I was only able to complete two of them due to exhaustion.

Went to work and again couldn't wait to get home. Appetite improved a little, and I had a small order of KFC.

Had trouble sleeping, however.

November 1, 2009. Some more improvement. Stayed home from church. Read through my comments on www.examiner.com. Of course I had to respond to Child Advocate who doesn't know the meaning of the word quit or due process or civil rights.

Depression lifting, although not completely gone.

Decided to write up this little piece and post it on www.examiner.com to let my readers know that you can survive the H1N1 virus, if that is indeed what I have. I believe it is, although it is quite difficult to distinguish it from other flus.

Which brings us to the question of the H1N1 vaccine. If what I had was the H1N1 flu, I would have taken the vaccine if I had known how bad it was going to be, and if I was reassured through my own research that the vaccine was safe.

What about vaccinating children? I have always been a proponent of vaccinating children against childhood diseases. However, I have always believed that vaccinating against the flu was somewhat silly, since for me the flu has never been that big of a deal. Even when I get nausea, vomiting and the like, it's usually gone within 24 hours or so.

However, while this flu did not have the vomiting and g.i. problems (except for lots of gas), it was the worst flu I ever had. The physical weakness was incredible, but the psychological aspect of the flu was the most serious characteristic. The depression that came with it is some of the worst I have ever experienced and caused me to wish I were dead, especially during the first two days.

I would be interested in knowing whether other people have experienced severe depression with the H1N1 flu or any flu, and if anyone has ever attempted suicide due to the depression.

And yes if what I had was the H1N1 flu and if I was sure the vaccine was safe (please notice that qualification), I would vaccinate my children as well.

Would I consider it child abuse or neglect if you did not vaccinate your children against the swine flu? No. Although I might feel differently if you did not vaccinate them against polio and other childhood diseases, with some limited exceptions.

Starting to feel chilly again. I'm off to bed. I will stick in an Andy Griffith Show dvd in the player. About the only television I can tolerate right now.

For more info: For more information about the swine flu, click here.