RSS
Home
Romance poll: the result are in. now what?
Print
Email
RSS
Subscribe
The results of the Romance Poll are in. 45% of women said they were satisfied with the amount of romance in their relationship, 55% said they were not satisfied. Surprisingly, more evenly split than I would have guessed. But I want to talk to the 55%, because I believe if we had a bigger sample size that percentage would have been much higher.
So where does the whole need for romance come from? I’d be interested to hear your opinions on this. Is it something we’re born with? Do we pop out of the womb with an innate craving for a candle lit dinner or a surprise bouquet of flowers? Or do we learn it from television, love songs, fairy tales and society in general? Most likely it’s all of the above. But, regardless of where our desire for romance comes from, a lot of women face one big problem: Our romantic needs are not being met. The truth is, that Y chromosome causes all sorts of interference with a man's ability to successfully, without assistance, satiate a woman’s romantic appetite. Now don’t get me wrong, I’ve met men who are great at romancing, but I’m pretty sure they’re the exception to the rule. Think about it, our brain chemistry is different than a man's. We don’t evaluate situations in the same way as men. We are two completely different creatures. So why do we think they would know exactly what we want when it comes to romance?
What I'm saying is, chances are your man is not sitting at home thinking about how great it would be to have you run a bubble bath with soft music playing while you whisper sweet nothings in his ear. These thoughts do not naturally occupy his brain. So what’s a girl to do?
One of the most important things we can do is tell our partner what we like. Sure, in our fantasy relationship world we’d love our man to know exactly what we want when we want it. But eventually we need to wake up. They are not mind readers. Repeat. They are not mind readers. So, until you actually have a talk, make a list, or set reminders on his iPhone, you have no right to get mad at his lack of effort or unsuccessful attempts at romancing you. Once you have your talk with him and make your list, make sure he understands why this is important to you. Tell him how you would feel, what it would mean to you if he made the effort of kicking the kids out of the house, lighting some candles, cooking a nice meal AND doing the dishes. (replace with whatever your idea of romance is)
One important point I want to make clear. Even if he is romantic, his idea of romance may be different than yours. Maybe he doesn’t want to bring you flowers. Maybe that wouldn't mean anything to him. Maybe his way of showing you he loves you is to scratch your back in the middle of the night or send you a midday text telling you he loves you. Recognize the sentiment behind these actions. He’s showing you he cares, in his own way, in a way that is important to him. This is just as romantic and should be equally appreciated.
So what are you waiting for? Make your list!
Related Articles:
Comments
