Who says happy goes with Thanksgiving?
Image courtesy of brownielocks.com, with permission
Preparing for the holiday season can be stressful for a lot of people, but when you are the lead lady of the house, it is agonizing. Surviving the meal alone, is a feat Superman couldn’t accomplish, but somehow, women pull it off year after year, and live to tell the tale. How do we do it, you ask? We don’t have a clue, maybe it is heredity, passed to us partly through genetics and partly by example.
During the party planning for large celebrations, we all have images dancing through our heads of the most amazing, golden brown, moist, flavorful turkey the world has ever seen. Beautiful table settings, with glittering crystal, shiny polished silver, perfectly ironed table cloths and a centerpiece of grand proportions. Steaming hot and aromatic side dishes worthy of a White House Holiday, and of course, perfectly behaved children sitting and waiting politely for the meal to begin.
The day looms closer, and with plans set in stone, it is time to "get ‘er done. "
Women spring to action all over the country, cars race to grocery stores, horns honk across town, buggies’ race down aisles, as frantic women search for their list items. Nothing short of perfection will be tolerated, we must please our family, save face, impress the masses. This special day will be ruined, if this meal is not the best I have ever accomplished.
Cooking delicacies takes precision, everything must be timed to the nth degree. No room for mistakes, if to much time is taken fussing over the green bean casserole, the dressing is burned. Linger extra seconds on the sweet potatoes, and the gravy is scorched. Forget to take the giblets out of the turkey, well, the
psyche ward can be called, and a bed readied!
Bordering on hysteria,
stressed beyond recognition, and completely spent, we actually manage to complete all the tasks at hand. Our backs, minds, hands, feet, even our hair hurts, having worked ourselves within an inch of life. But we are VICTORIOUS, dinner accomplished. Martha Stewart, Paula Dean, and Rachel Ray, eat your hearts out, this is a dinner to rival any on the globe!
Our husbands and children, hate us now, we have bitten off more heads than we can chew. But, we don't care, we say with a nasty tone, "sit, eat, smile, and say, thank you Mom, you have outdone yourself this time!" Oblivious to the
danger, everyone jumps into a chair, slops food on a plate, (never mentioning the table setting) and inhales your hard work in minutes, setting new land speed records. Then they all flee the dining room as if you had set their pants on fire, the men to watch football, and the kids outside to play. Funny how the outcome is never what you’ve dreamed
You are left, exhausted, angry, and sad, with a mountain of dirty dishes, a stained tablecloth, and dreams of the perfect family dinner dashed for another year. Our final thought as we gather the dishes and head for the kitchen? Next year, this entire
family is getting hot dogs, and since it is Thanksgiving, they will have to be thankful!
Special Thanks to Brownie Locks, for express permission to use their cartoon art and web link. For fun holiday ideas and activities, click on their name to be directed to brownielocks.com
Click here for Pyzam art and graphics, this site may not be suitable for all ages.
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