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Superheroes That Say the F-Word
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Billy Crudup as “Dr. Manahttan” in Watchmen (2009)
Don’t take your kids to see Watchmen. With that said, I can say that Watchmen is probably one of the best comic book/novel to movie productions I have seen in a long time. It captures every aspect of the books almost perfectly and is flawlessly cast. This isn’t really a review of the film though. I feel if I sat here and typed away about how great of movie this is and how everyone should see, it would be a waste of my time and yours. Like some of the other movies I talk about, I’d rather help people understand them rather than critique every shot and give you any other post-film school nerd crap you usually read. First off, Watchmen is in no way Batman: The Dark Knight. Fans of the stereotypical superhero film, loaded with over the top non-stop action sequences and the good guy kickin’ bad guy behind for the good of the city, might be disappointed. The “heroes” in this film rape, kill the somewhat-innocent, dabble in homosexuality, assassinate world leaders, cheat on their significant others, have illegitimate children, and on top of that, are retired.
Jeffrey Dean Morgan as “The Comedian” in Watchmen (2009)
Watchmen takes place in an alternate-history 1985, where Nixon is still president due to being re-elected via a changed third term policy. America has won the Vietnam War and other turning points in history have been altered and botched due to the publicly acceptable knowledge of superheroes. In this version of superhero lore, during the rise in gang crime of 1930s, one police officer and friends decided to wear masks like the bank robbers and fight crime off the clock. The original group of superheroes were called the “The Minutemen” and existed alongside the not-in-real-life comic book variants like Superman and the like. These were normal people sans super powers, and were accepted with applause and praise. As time went by, The Minutemen started to change and age, as real people do. Some were forced into retirement and others were killed off in not-so-superhero fashion, or simply locked up for mental health reasons. For example, one of the original do-gooders is said to have gotten his cape caught in a revolving door trying to stop an armed robbery, and shot to death. After years of trying to keep it up the three remaining Minutemen call it quits. “Night-Owl” is one of them, he retires. A Bettie Page inspired “Silk Spectre” is the second to retire. “The Comedian”, a cigar smoking, booze drinking, all around man’s man retires and goes off to do government wet work. Years later, at the start of the Vietnam War, a second wave of superheroes emerged. Dubbed “The Watchmen”, it included the “Silk Spectre’s” daughter, a replacement “Night Owl”, Rorschach (an ink blot mask wearing disturbed proponent of absolutism), “Ozymandias” (touting the title “smartest man in the world” and the son of some Nazis), and finally “Dr. Manhattan”. Dr. Manhattan is the only superhero to actually posses super powers. He was once a scientist but due to a catastrophic accident, he becomes transformed in to a god-like, glowing blue, bulked up version of himself. He basically has the power to bend and manipulate matter in any way he seems fit. He can also teleport and teleport objects and people. He can grow to varying sizes and make people explode. Obviously a perfect tool for winning the Vietnam War, he is sent to Indochina where he defeats America’s supposed enemy. As masked vigilantes become less of a public service in the 70s and early 80s, and more of a annoyance, they are outlawed. The second Night-Owl retires just as the first but without any real praise, in addition to the second Silk Spectre. The Comedian goes into hiding and Dr. Manhattan gets put to work by the government in a secret base. Although, Rorschach continues to illegally “fight crime”.
This brings us to the start of the film. Like I said pre-backstory, it’s an alternate 1985. New York City is basically in shambles and superheroes are a hated, lost breed. Watchmen takes you on a psuedo-melodramatic ride through what superheroes have become. They’re depressed, overweight, and don’t care about good or evil anymore. In this movie, the good and evil lines aren’t even actually clear. What you get out of this film though isn’t just a drama about superheroes with emotional problems. It’s a complete look at what superheroes would be if they were indeed, just average people. With the addition of Dr. Manhattan though, you see what would also happen if the U.S. suddenly received the power of the gods, and the resulting political aftermath. Watchmen is a satire above all, and should be viewed that way. Shed any knowledge of The Dark Knight before viewing, and keep an open mind about...certain blue body parts. It’s a long movie too, but keep in mind that it’s almost 400 pages at 9 panels a page condensed into a 2 hour script. Zack Snyder definitely has risen above his attempt at 300 and really shows his skills with Watchmen. This film does deliver on the action at times, but it’s not as frequent as most superhero movies. It also doesn't get cut short in the superhero-sex department. All-in-all, I can definitely see myself watching this movie over and over once it’s released on DVD. There’s so much material covered it’s near impossible to take it all in in one viewing, let alone make complete sense of everything if you haven’t read the books. For any true comic book fan I absolutely recommend reading the books before seeing the movie, there’s about 13 of them. The backstory alone is only touched upon in the film.
So go see this movie. See it in IMAX, see it in theaters, watch it on the internet, buy it on DVD when it comes out, download it off the internet when it comes out on DVD. Whatever you gotta do. It’s worth the time and definitely worth a watch if you’re not a fan of good guy stops bad guy and saves city, then get's girl.
See it here in IMAX and here in theaters in and around Boston.
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