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Internet Dating: Phase four going offline
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Hooray you have made an online connection! After enjoying some online banter it is time to see if your online connection can translate to offline interactions.
Client's often ask if the next step in this process has to be on the phone...my advice is to meet in person first! If your face-to-face meeting does not go well then you can walk away without ever giving away your personal contact information. However, If you choose to share your telephone number, be clear about times and days that you are available and ask for their numbers so that you can program your phone with their info for caller id and screening purposes.
Don't move too quickly! While a nice connection online always feels good, remember your safety.
- Do not give out too much personal information like your bank account numbers, where you work, live, go to school, etc.
- Use the communication channels that the dating websites give you until you have met in person.
- Take your time to ask this new person questions and remember to screen for any red flags.
- Does the conversation feel reciprocal? Do they seem interested in YOU or only interested in their next online conquest?
- Pay attention to how you feel; are you excited, nervous, challenged, freaked out? Remember you have NO OBLIGATION to go any further if a connections does not make you feel safe.
Don't take too long! Chatting for weeks or months can be a colossal waste of time...and the energy that you have created online can quickly fade away to other online prospects or just lack of interest.
- Four hour chats can be either life changing or a complete waste of time.
- Try to limit calls until you really know you want to be investing that much time into another person.
- Create boundaries around when you IM or talk, these kinds of conversations should not be going on at work nor should they be keeping you up all night.
- Remember your responsibilities to work and other social events. Try not to let a brand new relationship take over your other social outlets and put all of your eggs in this new basket.
- The longer you postpone actually meeting you are investing more in the fantasy of this new connection instead of exploring it in reality. So unless you would like to have an online romance instead of an in-person relationship, go ahead keep chatting, but if you are ready go ahead and test it out face-to-face.
Once you have both agreed to meet schedule that first meeting strike while the chemistry is still hot and move to the next phase.
Do you have a crazy Internet Dating Dating story about an IM, CHAT, or telephone call? Comment below!
For additional tips on how to navigate this phase on Internet Dating, contact me at havi@health-e-connections.com.
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