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Fall in Love, with yourself
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God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. Courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference.
The Serenity Prayer is one that many people have surely said in reference to life’s obstacles. If we could just apply the prayer’s concept to our physical appearances, we could begin to accept a more realistic body image and love ourselves. Everyone has personal hang-ups about their body that may seem amplified to only themselves. Women particularly are prone to feelings of self hate or dissatisfaction due to negative body images portrayed through media and gender role stereotypes. While having the occasional “bad hair day” or “ugly day” is normal, it is not okay to allow those feelings to control the way you live your life or interfere with your personal relationships with others.
Not accepting yourself in your life will undoubtedly affect other areas of your life, especially relationships with family, friends and significant others. Someone who doesn’t accept themselves is more likely to have low self-esteem and be prone to accepting treatment less than deserving in professional and personal relationships. For example a woman who isn’t confident within her looks or talents might engage in an emotionally, or physically abusive relationship/friendships or accept unfair treatment on the job. Often, men and women lose their own voice and opinions opting to accept others attitudes as their own. For example, Miss Voorhees College 2009-2010 Shampale Williams experienced a similar experience with accepting others’ attitudes when she was pressured by school officials to conform to tradition and change her natural hairstyle to a straight, relaxed style. As detailed in a recent interview with Essence Magazine Williams eventually gave in the pressure saying “I just kept telling myself, you’re doing this for the school.”
Before you seek confirmation from a romantic relationship or friendships, fall in love with yourself first by;
1. Find that one physical feature you absolutely love and play up its full potential. If you have great eyes, wear dramatic eye shadow to draw attention to them.
2. Look in the mirror and say “I love you” aloud until you believe it.
3. Find activities that make you feel good. If you are a good dancer, go dancing or try a new technique class or if you enjoy cooking, prepare a meal and indulge in your culinary skills.
4. Make an active effort to improve your weaknesses’ and play up your strengths. If you are a shy person try going to an acting class at a local theatre company. Spotlight your strength, if you are a great writer submit written work to the local paper or apply jobs such as examiner.com to get recognition.
5. Make a list of all the positive things that make you, you. Include everything from “I make a great omelet” to “I am a great friend”. Once you see how long the list growsA and how great you are you can’t help not to smile and fall in love.
6. Seek counseling if you are having difficulty progressing towards truly loving yourself.
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