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Starship Troopers Week: The Sequels!
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The rest of Starship Troopers Week ends here, as both sequels to the original will be condensed into one review. Read on as I rip the rest of the franchise a new one. Starship Troopers 2: Hero of the Federation Well, not quite ripping a new one, not yet at least. This cheap follow up wasn't as bad as it was originally recieved (the film was panned by virtually everyone, critics and fans alike), but it was definitely a downgrade. It starts off following an unknown Federation squad. We quickly learn that the Federation is now using psychics in the war against the bugs, and one of them, along with a bunch of roughnecks, hole up in a recently-made abandoned defense station on a bug planet. While their captain is off on a search and rescue mission, the psychic is put in charge, and boy, is he a whiny little bitch. The crew fends off a bunch of bugs, then some of the soldiers die, etc. etc. The story only picks up when ol' Cap. returns with three soldiers from the search and rescue. These soldiers he brings back, two fellas and a lady, are a bit strange in behavior, and we soon learn our suspicions are correct: They're definitely up to no good.
If this didn't have the Starship name attached to it, it'd be a medicore indepedent horror flick at best. That's the problem, though: When you finish watching the original Starship, you're left wanting more, and when you pick up Hero of the Federation, you don't get what you want. It's more horror than sci-fi, the F/X aren't up to snuff, some shots make it look like it was shot on video, and 90% of it takes place at that same defense station. Stand alone, it was alright, but they missed the Starship mark here. All the great undertones from the first film are gone here...in fact almost all substance has been removed, leaving us with a bare bones horror film concept.
So the bottom line with this one is, if you can hang with super-low budget horror fare and you don't mind that it so loosely borrows the Starship name, watch it. If you're looking for more of the first, skip it.
In response to the poor...response of Hero of the Federation, the franchise's second outing, screenwriter for the first Starship, Ed Neumeier, comes on to direct the third film, Marauder, which he also wrote. The satire's back, covering civil virtue and capitol punishment (to a certain extreme this time), and there's even new stuff now, like new bugs (including a bouncy-explody-ball bug and a scorpion bug), new punishment to those who badmouth the Federation (televised hangings) and even a new weapon for our soldiers (a shovel...ha ha...no seriously, it's a shovel). And, OHMYGOSH, RICO'S BACK!!! The third film starts off with a bang, off and running with a propaganda message chockfull of "would you like to know more", a poppy song by the Federation's Sky Marshall titled "It's a Good Day to Die", and an infomercial followed by a "would you like to BUY more?". Sounds like the first one again, ya? Soon though, you'll start to realize that something's off about this one, something a bit more...sucky.
The story is this: A ship carrying the Sky Marshall goes down and crash lands on a bug planet. The crash's survivors, which include a female captain, a stewardess, the Sky Marshall, a cook and two other guys, decide to hoof it across the bug planet for no other reason than avoiding staying in one place. That pretty much sums it up. Back on Earth, Rico gets court marshalled and ordered to hang for no reason, but then gets pardoned to help the stranded on the bug planet. Then, he does. Then, the credits roll. A big theme of the film is religion, but then it turns out not to be the religion we thought it to be, then it does, and...at the end of the film, you seriously question how much involvement Neumeier had in writing the first film, because this sucks so bad you'll be pulling your freaking hair out trying to make sense of the nonsensical plot. It's garbage, plain and simple.
You'll notice other things too. Maybe you can make a fun game out of it, and we'll call it, "Which Crappy Aspect of This Movie Will I Notice First?" Will it be the visual effects that are bested by Playstation 2 graphics, or will it be the fact that Neumeier couldn't properly direct if his life depended on it? "Wait!", you say, "What about Casper Van Dien?" That'll probably be the first thing you notice, actually: Casper Van Dien sucks if he's not directed well. Paul Verhoeven? Good Rico, convincing Rico. Ed Neumeier? Out of place Rico, doesn't belong on screen Rico, and should stop acting all together Casper Van Dien. In his defense, the acting is all around terrible.
It's so tempting to watch this in hopes of a return to form, but be warned: This could very well ruin the Starship Troopers experience for you entirely.
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