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I read a blog by Grace Gatsby regarding Lezbros. Grace defines Lezbros as :
a lesbian’s cool, straight male friends, which (for the most part) see us as more of a wing(wo)man rather than a potential porno fantasy. Lezbros are every lady’s dream come true, right? No muss, no fuss friendships with none of that messy, “is it real date?” nonsense. Plus, you have someone to gossip with outside of your entourage and someone to go girl-watching with.
This is a new term for me. I am thrilled to have found an apt descriptor for the many important men in my life. Though Grace implied in her blog that the role of Lezbros is an emerging phenomenon, I would argue that it is as common and long standing as the f@g hag. Picasso loved attending the weekly salons at Gertrude Stein and Alice B. Toklas’ flat. I’m sure it wasn’t just Alice's magical brownies influencing his perception of the experience. Picasso was a Lezbro.
When I referenced Google for Lezbros, I found a documentary on the Logo channel that opens the Lezbro field (thankfully) to all men who have an affinity for lesbians, regardless of sexual orientation.
To forego the many benefits of friendship with men due to sexual orientation seems absurd. When I pause to ponder the men who have been influential in my life, the ones that I love like family (or who are family), I realize that there have been hundreds of them over the years. From early childhood onward, there have always been males within my inner circle of friends. My two closest friends in Atlanta are male. I have my gay husband, Bill, and Tony, who is like a brother. They keep me sane. They keep me grounded. They call me on my melodramatic theatrics and put up with my periodic fits of nonsense. My world would have signifcantly less sparkle and glow without my guys.
I have always had remarkably good fortune when it comes to finding amazing men. Though several of my Lezbros are gay, the vast majority are heterosexual. All of the heterosexual men that I befriend have shared traits. They are all men with an enormous amount of confidence. They don’t have a compelling need for external validation of their masculinity. They are all people who are trying to figure things out beyond gender, whether that is within themselves or the world at large. They all exemplify the potential within humanity (and masculinity) for compassion, curiousity, empathy, protectiveness and tolerance.
The benefit of being a lesbian with an affinity for men is that you can collect a harem of brilliant, gorgeous, compassionate men, the absolute best and brightest, without getting into trouble for infidelity and without having to clean up after them.
Whereas I have no sexual interest in men, I would argue that the complementary relationship between men and women extends beyond sex. There are reasons for two genders beyond procreation. There are reasons for the subtle differences between men and women beyond survival and child rearing. A healthy relationship between a man and a woman often brings out the best in both, whether the relationship is intimate sexually or intimate psychologically and emotionally. What woman doesn’t find some comfort knowing she has ‘brothers’ to watch her back? What man doesn’t benefit from having a ‘sister’ who understands them and accepts them for who they are while calling them out on B.S.? I love my Lezbros and I don't know where I would be without them.
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