I’ve been in what my good friends have come to know as “Judy Martin’s self induced boot camp.” That’s when projects seem to come of age at the same time, my work in tv, radio and blogging converge and my personal life is thrust into some sort of chaotic state. It’s actually a good time. Often quite creative, but it must be balanced with exercise and meditation to avoid burn out. This mode is likely to manifest when death comes knocking. It makes me think about work and life through a new lens. There’s a freedom in thoughts of : “what if it all ended tomorrow.”
The cream of significant, poignant and imperative concerns rise to the surface. My focus becomes laser-sharp and priorities make most other things irrelevant. Death can do that. It’s not unusual as I’m Hospice trained and often find myself in the company of others who are somehow going through the experience. But when it’s a friend who is preparing to pass, it’s a little different, and draws one into self-contemplation.
A friend who just turned sixty years old was just diagnosed with a brain tumor which is likely inoperable. She is a talented artist, a deeply spiritual person who despite her efforts, chose not to dive into the career she wanted. I’ll refrain from more details to keep confidentiality.
The point is that for years she spoke about wanting to take a different path. Some days would be filled with research, and connecting with people in her field of interest - but she never took the necessary steps toward setting the foundation for radical change. Actually, she never chose to jump off the proverbial career cliff. It’s not a good or bad thing - it just is - was - her choice. She preferred to dabble in her passion instead of taking it to the next level. Again, not a good or bad thing. It just is - was - her choice.
My friend often incorporates her artistic skills into her daily life. She paints, cooks, writes and creates beautiful pieces of art. She is able to live her passion daily - albeit aggravated that she isn’t making enough cash. Her home is always open to those who want to just dish on life, creativity and spiritual pursuits.
Generally happy, this woman had never strived for relevance in the art world, but she mostly loves her artistic pursuits, work and life. That, I suppose, puts her in a better position that most people struggling in jobs that they hate.
Now, faced with death, she’s making more time to do more of what makes her happy. She’ll create artwork that she wants to create -not what others want her to design. She’ll spend more time with her dog even when she might be on deadline to get a project completed. She’ll take the time to make soup from scratch, instead of a can.
Pressure to perform has been tossed aside in favor of just living one day at a time, in a new state of awareness. No regrets, though some thoughts of what might have been. But they are rare. Every moment counts, every second counts, every relationship counts, every new batch of homemade soup counts.
What’s a legacy after you are gone? What meaning does it really have? Note to self for today: Be happy now and figure out a way to make the living and working experience journey, a more peaceful, creative and meaningful one. Enjoy the fruits of your passionate work now. Don’t wait till you’re on top to take a breath.
When you drive toward success on a raceway, be sure to stop in the gas pit. Refuel. Don’t keep doing donuts on the raceway of life. Talk to the fans along the way. Engage in life, in love, in relationships. What’s the point in making it to the finish line if it wasn’t fun along the way. Don’t waste a moment.
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The work/life freedom in the death experience
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