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The 2008 (sports widow’s) year in review
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As 2008 comes to a close, we sports widows look back on a magical year. It was a year of anticipation; a year in which the grooves of our couches grew just a bit deeper. Most importantly, we all learned something this year: What doesn’t kill us, makes us watch baseball until 2 am on a weeknight.
Here’s a look back at a few great sports widow moments from 2008…
April 26th: The NFL Draft.
Men all over the Greater Philadelphia Area mysteriously disappeared for twelve hours. Wives spent four hours fretting over their whereabouts before heading out to the nearest DSW to stock up on espadrilles and miscellaneous winter clearance items. The men eventually resurfaced, grumbling about how The Eagles managed to avoid a first round pick for the second year in a row or something like that. Andy Reid was tarred and feathered.
July 27th: The Arena Bowl.
The Philadelphia Soul (apparently) became the Arena Bowl XXII Champions. Seventeen people noticed.
October 7th: The “Fire Andy Reid” Petition.
Andy Reid had just finished cleaning off the feathers when this emerged.
October 27th: World Series, Game Five.
Game Five was suspended in the sixth inning due to inclement weather. The world literally stopped spinning. Fans were distraught. Sports widows spent the next 48 hours clinging to their last remaining shreds of sanity.
October 29th: The Phillies Won The World Series.
Sports widows waved a fond, long overdue, farewell to baseball season as fans flooded the streets of Philadelphia to celebrate a victory for the losingest team in MLB history. Brotherly love was abundant. Even the SWAT team had a good time.
December 28th: The Eagles Beat The Cowboys.
It was a joyous occasion as the stars aligned for the Eagles, who defeated the Cowboys to secure their spot in the playoffs. Immediately thereafter, T.O. was featured crying in a two-hour Lifetime special.
Meanwhile, a solid gold statue was constructed in Andy Reid’s honor. Everyone went to work on Monday wearing “I Love Andy” t-shirts. Sports widows sort of cared a little.
Indeed, it was a beautiful year for Philadelphia. Can 2009 top it? We’ll find out soon enough.
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- Ace: A team’s best starting pitcher.
- Brushback: A pitch that is purposely thrown too close to the batter in an effort to intimidate him.
- Bullpen: The place off to the side of the field where relief pitchers and catchers warm up during the game.
- Closer: A pitcher who consistently comes in to get the final outs of the game.
- Fall Classic: October’s matchup between the American League Champion and the National League Champion. Otherwise known as “The World Series".
- Manufacturing runs: The act of scoring runs by advancing slowly, one base at a time.
- RBI (Run Batted In): A batter gets an RBI when a teammate scores a run as a result of the batter getting a hit, a walk, or a single out.
- Relief pitcher: A pitcher that is brought in as a substitue for another pitcher.
- Take a pitch: When a batter chooses not to swing at a pitch.
- Scoring position: A runner is considered to be in scoring position when he is on second or third base.
- Find more baseball terms here.
