It's Monday morning and you are scrambling to get everyone ready for work and daycare. One of your kids is dressed and brushing their teeth, your youngest is running around in just a pull-up diaper - on his head! And you are trying to eat your english muffin, drink your Dr. Pepper, and straighten your hair.
As your youngest comes in and plows into the back of your legs one more time, almost knocking you onto your face, you snap. "Now stop it right now! GET INTO YOUR ROOM AND GET DRESSED NOW!" Your blood pressure just shot up. Why can't they listen to me ever ? you think. Oh no, it's 8:10! I will never be on time now. errrr...
That is about the time your two angels get into a fight over who gets to pour their lucky charms first. Followed closely by who gets to hold the cereal box and read the letters out loud. And another favorite argument, “I wanted that bowl for me mooomeeee! HE WON"T GIVE ME MY SPOON BACK!!!!! “And then *SMACK* “OUCH! “Followed by screaming and before you know it your children are involved in a bar room like brawl on your kitchen floor. Milk and cereal is flying, hair is being pulled and everyone is crying.
Being a working mom is stressful and you can't always know what to do in every situation. It is best to not plan for anything. Just kind of go with what works at the time. In this scenario, just pick up whoever is on top and carry them to their room closing the door firmly behind you. Then go get the second offender and do the same. Making them stay there till everyone cools off. At first you may want to just give in to them when they beg and plead, saying they are sorry, that they won't do it again. But it is best to handle the fights as calmly as you can, and try to always follow through. After a few weeks of repeatedly following through your children are going to know that if they fight you are going to punish them every time. Now as they get older you will be able to let them fight it out, but at this young age it is not safe to let them figure it out on their own.
You can check out supernanny.com for some more ideas on how to win the constant battles with your children. Or at the very least how to cope with your children as they go through these many different phases of their development. There is also an excellent reward chart section on supernanny's page. You can print out age specific reward charts for free, they even come with detailed instructions so that you can get the most out of your children when using the charts. Stock up on small party favor toys that you can get at the dollar store. Use these as rewards for good behavior instead of any kind of treat or snack.
For more on dealing with agressive children, see How do you deal with a bully at the playground?
Please email me with any comments or questions at klbridge86@yahoo.com. Was this article helpful? Would you like to see more on this topic? Please leave your comments below.
Comments
good article! I've printed out the pirate chart from super nanny, but haven't gotten around to using it yet!
I find your article very informative! I will try the charts from supernanny - I need something to try to get my kids in line :)
this is a great article, the idea of offering small, inexpensive party favors instead of food is a wonderful idea!! so many times we think that rewards=food and this can cause problems as our children get older. love supernanny too :)
Such a GREAT article and all to sooooreal in everyday life.
No reason to get up set and yell....that only makes matters worse,or teach them,that's okay because you did it.(NOT) We are their examples, as much as we know or don't know. Another way to reward(if child is old enought)is give money...say a penny, nickel, dime or quarter when being good. Also a take away when "bad? Have child put in a special place of there own bank, etc. Save up for a item that they would want to purchase for themself or family member.
Good idea K, money motivates them definitely. I am actually writing another article about potty training and some ideas involving money to get them to go...will be posting soon :)
And Kimbee, the little party favors can also be recycled, cuz we all know how kids forget about a toy almost as soon as they have it in their hands. so don't buy too many things.
Juan, check out supernanny's site to get some more advice. she has so much out there. Or just come back here and read what I write, i will do the research and condense it in fun, easy to read articles ;)
A friend of mine just told me you can get a unpainted treasure chest at JoAnn's for the prizes/rewards. and Painting the treasure chest can be part of the reward!
thank you MaryBeth!!
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