Recently, I wrote an article about a new local speed dating service here in Rapid City. Today I sat with one of the owners of Co-Mingle Entertainment, David Goodwin, who hosts the speed dating events to talk about the origins and the future of speed dating in South Dakota.
Dave said he started thinking about this idea since 2007. After 20 years of living in Rapid City, he felt like there was a need for a way to meet women who were interested in meeting men and looking for relationships. After trying online dating, he knew that there had to a better way to find out if two people were interested in each other. Dave feels that for him at least, online dating simply doesn't work. Especially in a smaller area such as Rapid City. Originally, he tried approaching other companies to host events here, and they all said it was too small a venue for them to go to the expense of hosting an event here. Finally, he decided to move ahead with it himself.
According to FaceBook, there are over 3000 single people in the area. Dave feels this indicates there is a strong need for a new way to meet people you might otherwise not meet. Now it's just a matter of finding the places to host events and getting the word out. The first event was on May 13 at Budd Ugly's downtown. The next event will be on June 24th, also at Budd Ugly's. Dave is hoping to find new places to host other events, but is enjoying the atmosphere and help from the owners at Budd Ugly's. He also loves the fact that on Thursdays after the events, there's a comedy show which gives the participants something do after their round of three minutes dates.
Dave is currently single, never been married, and while he didn't get to participate in the first event he is hoping to get to be able to at some point. His parents are divorced and they both were daters at the first event. Dave is busy being enlisted in the Army and the Vice President of the Rapid City Kennel Club helping people learn about obedience training. Add in the development of Co-Mingle Entertainment and he has a pretty full plate.
The biggest problems he's running into are the stigmas associated with speed dating and getting the word out to the men in the community. People seem to think that speed dating is the last resort of dating options, despite how safe and easy it is. In one hour, you get around a dozen three minute dates. No one has to share any contact information they don't want to, and you're in a safe location. To help people figure out what to talk about during the three minutes and to keep track of the people you are meeting, the event coordinators supply you with a dating book. There are icebreakers in the book to help you get conversation started and for notes on the people you definitely do and do not want to meet again. Dave is hoping that he will be able to offer some coupons for local restaurants to use on second dates with the people you want to see again, but so far hasn't found much support.
He also has run into some problems finding support even in giving money to companies to help advertise the service. KNBN refused to let him sponsor the news, feeling that a local speed dating service wasn't an appropriate sponsor. He feels that this goes along with the misinterpretation of of who looks to speed dating for a new way to meet people. This isn't a service to allow people to find a quick hookup or a sexual partner. The service is geared towards people are tired of hoping to meet someone new to meet in bars without any real structure to who you're meeting. Not to mention the fact that despite the events at the moment are in bars, Dave is also hoping to have some fun speed dating events at non-bar establishments.
The registration fees are expected to stay around $20.00 per event. This helps pay for the website hosting, design, maintenance, location, and advertising. It also serves as a commitment by the people registering for the event. It's vital that there be an even number of men and women for the event to work. The goal is to have twelve of each at least. Knowing how many people they have is important, but giving them a reason not to chicken out is also part of it. It's not enough just to register, you actually have to show up for speed dating to work.
Most of my adult life has been spent in much bigger cities that Rapid City, and while moving here was motivated in part to move back to a small town it does make meeting someone a different challenge than say Portland, Oregon. Meeting people in bars is not always where the best option. Finding time to volunteer or attend events in hopes of meeting men who have similar interests can be difficult. Speed dating is an extremely cost effective way to meet more people and get to know them better than you would at the end of a night at a bar. The safety issue of giving out too much personal information to a stranger is also handled by the way the the website system is developed. Anyone who hasn't tried speed dating should reconsider and give it a try.
To register for an event or learn more about the way it works, check out www.localspeeddates.com.
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Nan Clegg, Rapid City Womens Relationship Examiner
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