It may shock some of you to realize that suicide is now the fourth leading cause of death for adults between 18-65 years old in the United States, with over 33,000 cases reported annually. It is also the fifth leading cause of death among children 5-14 years old, and third among those 15-24. In fact, it is said that someone attempts suicide every minute, while someone actually dies by it approximately every fifteen minutes in the U.S. It is also reported that four times as many men than women die by suicide, although three times as many women make an attempt to kill themselves.
For those left behind, coping with a loved one's suicide can leave a "gaping hole in the fabric of one's life." It is important for them, as well as those around them to understand that coming to terms with their grief is a highly individual process and that everyone grieves in their own way. There is also no set time for how long the healing process may take. Some survivors may shut down and shun public contact. However, maintaining contact with other people is very important, and others do find comfort in being able to talk about their feelings with a trusted friend or relative. Perhaps even a member of the clergy or other support group.
While many survivors may struggle to admit to others that their loved one died by suicide, it is often best for them to acknowledge it as part of their own healing process. Most importantly, survivors need to be kind to themselves, and when they feel ready, begin to go on with their own lives without a feeling of guilt that they are doing so.
Children survivors are especially vulnerable to feeling of guilt and may also fear abandonment by others. It is vital that adults reach out to them and reassure them that they are not responsible for the death. Open yourself to their feelings and try to answer their questions in a straight forward (age appropriate) manner.
For more information and guidance, you might want to contact the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP). Founded in 1987, this non-profit organization is dedicated exclusively to understanding and preventing suicide through a variety of methods, including educational programs for both professionals and the public at large, funding scientific research into the causes, and promoting policies and legislation regarding suicide and prevention. They also provide programs and resources for survivors of suicide loss, as well as those people at risk for committing suicide.
AFSP currently has over 32 local chapters throughout the United States. For more information please contact them at:
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention
120 Wall Street, 22nd Floor
New York, NY 10005
Toll-free: 1-888-333-2377
Phone: (212) 363-3500
Fax: (212) 363-6237
Website: www.afsp.org
Email: inquiry@afsp.org
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