Valentine's Day songs for haters

 

Tomorrow is a day for love. Chocolates, flowers, greeting cards with cupids and puppies, romantic music and chilled wine. Such sentiment may not sit right with a lot of folks out there, whether for reasons of singleness (who wants to celebrate love when they don't have a main squeeze of their own?) or aesthetics (all that maudlin sappiness can be a mite off-putting). So if you want to call phooey on love tomorrow, here's a little list of anti-Valentine's Day songs for those who'd prefer to revel -- or wallow -- in the dark side of amour. Enjoy!

1. The Angry Angles "You Call it Love." Jay Reatard (pre-solo act) released this song with his then-girlfriend, Alix Brown, on a 2005 EP. The cover art features Jay and Alix with matching black eyes. This song is all about abusive relationships: "Baby when you hit me/ It feels so good." Listen HERE.

2. Buzzcocks "Ever Fallen in Love (with someone you shouldn't've)." The title kind of says it all, doesn't it? Perhaps one of punk rock's finest odes to mismatched love, this plaintive tune is perfect for listeners who want to think about all their bad romantic choices on Valentine's Day. Listen HERE.

3. Circle Jerks "I Just Want Some Skank." Brutally frank, yes? Those lacking in sentimentality, sobriety or gentle seduction skills can't do without this puerile punk rock ode to meaningless sex from Hermosa Beach's finest. Listen HERE.

4. Hollywood Brats "Sick on You." These early 70's British Glam rockers mined similar territory to the New York Dolls. Later punked up by spin-off band the Boys, this is the slower, earliest version of this enmity-filled song. "I'm sick of everything you do/ And if I'm gonna be puke/ I'm gonna be sick on you." Listen HERE.

5. The Monks "I Hate You." American GI's who stayed behind in Germany after their tour of duty, the Monks shaved their pates, donned dark robes and released a series of scorching, organ-driven garage-psych numbers that are still sought by collectors. Features the immortal lines, "My hate's everlasting, baby/ But call me." Listen HERE.

6. Paul Collins Beat "Walking Out on Love." Paul Collins follow-up act to the Nerves was full of material about romantic unhappiness and jilted love. This driving pop monster asks the eternal question -- Why, baby, why? Listen HERE.

7. The Pleasure Seekers "What a Way to Die." An ode to alcoholism-over-love from a Detroit teen girl band? It's true. Dig these lyrics: "Your lovin' fluctuates, baby/ But everybody knows/ The temperature always stays the same/ On an ice cold bottle of Strohs." The Quatro sisters were just 15 and 17 in 1965 when this record was released. Listen HERE.

8. Reigning Sound "Bad Man." This incredible song from ex-Oblivion Greg Cartwright is the ultimate I-gotta-move-on song. "I'm not the one you want/ Though I know you think so...I'm no good for you..." Feel good about breaking up -- hey, you don't deserve her, right? Listen HERE.

9. The Statler Brothers "Flowers on the Wall." Rather than bursting with resentment, this sarcastic little anti-romantic gem is a slow-burner. All about the bleak, numbing emptiness that results from a breakup -- filling the void with cigarettes, television and sleeplessness -- the song is perfect for the lonely-hearted. Listen HERE.

10. Tammy Wynette "D-I-V-O-R-C-E." The last song on the list is about the most serious consequence of bad love: Divorce. Pour three fingers of scotch, throw this one on the turntable and shed a tear to Tammy and little Joe's sad tale: "He thinks that C-U-S-T-O-D-Y spells fun or play." Listen and cry HERE.