Dr. Pat Allen
It’s almost the end of Summer. You may be wondering, where is your summer romance?
Look no further, Dr. Pat Allen, called the “Love Doctor” and named by Oprah as the “Therapist, Comic Mother Superior, ” has some expert advice that you won’t want to miss.
Dr. Allen is a Marriage and Family Therapist, an internationally recognized communication and relationship expert and a Certified Transactional Analyst. For over ten years, her best-selling book, Getting to I Do has been a bible to many singles. It’s been a GPS to guide them to them altar.
Dr. Allen gives tips to simulate a man’s main sex organ, his eyes, in her new book, co-written with Don Schmincke, The Truth About Men Will Set You Free…but first it’ll p*ss you off! Allen writes, “Don’t worry about what he’s going to think about your job, family, background, friends…he just cares about how you look.”
Get our your lipsticks and pearls girls because love is in the air and we’ve got the tips to turn those heads.
Erin Laurence: What do women need to know before hitting the dating scene?
Dr. Pat Allen: First, you have to know the category of man you want. Women want generally. “I want a man who has old money from a good family.” Men want specifically. “I want her. “
EL: How do women attract men?
Dr. PA: It’s all marketing. If you’re marketing for the bad boys you dress for sex. If you market to the good boys you dress for the family.
EL: What is dressing for the family?
Dr. PA: It looks preppy. It likes like “good school,” “neat slacks.” It’s the sweater that matches and is tied around the neck.
Every woman can dress for the man she’s looking to attract. Old money dresses preppy. New money dresses trendy. If you like really brainy nerds, then you can wear nerdy clothes. If you like athletes then dress for an athlete.
If you’re a good girl and you dress sexy when you meet him, he might say to you, “You used to dress sexy and now your square.”
You can’t make a first impression twice.
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EL: Do men really care what you’re wearing?
Dr. PA: If he just wants sex he doesn’t care what you’re wearing. If you have a vagina that’s all he cares about. But if he’s looking for someone to relate to then he cares. Think like you’re going to an interview.
EL: What shouldn’t you wear?
Dr. PA: Don’t wear silk, silk sweats and shows anxiety. I don’t want you to sweat in front of him. It gives away the store. Then he can muscle power you into sex. And you give away the whole thing, all because you wore silk. Men are very visual.
EL: How important is being in good shape?
Dr. PA: The best bodies get the best money. It’s based on statistics. Rich women are thin unless they’re from another culture where men have freedom to have many women.
Dirtiest trick for a woman is to get him off the market and then break his toy (gain weight). Women say, “All you want from me is sex. “ And the answer is yes.
EL: Where should she go to meet her man?
Dr. PA: Go wherever men play. When she’s attracting she should do what makes her happy. If she wants to be in the sports scene it’s best if she naturally fits there.
EL: What are some tricks of the trade?
Dr. PA: Ask for help. Or make comments. But don’t personalize it. Don’t move on him and don’t interview him. Men like to help. Hide your Thomas Guide.
EL: Is there a Secret Weapon that will secure a first date?
Dr. PA: Look for five seconds and then smile. Unless you have something to say that’s innocuous. Be approachable. Smile. Desensitize him so he knows I’m friendly but that you’re not going to pursue him. Keep on being friendly. Then it’s easier for him to approach you.
Dr. Pat Allen is live on stage in Los Angeles every Monday evening at the Odyssey Theatre. You can find out more information about Dr. Pat Allen and order her books and tapes at http://www.drpatallen.com.
For more info: For more info: Erin Laurence is Co-Executive Producer and Segment Host of a new Fashion/Style TV show launching this fall. For more information contact: Erin@livesofstyle.com.
Comments
Is this satire? I really hope it is!
This is kind of the worst advice I've ever read.
Horrible, horrible advice. Are you serious? Thanks for undoing decades worth of attempting to encourage girls to develop their intellect, personality, skills...because basically it comes down to what you wear and how you look after all?
SHAMEFUL!
I really hope this is a joke.
I don't know what's worse, the advice or the numerous typos.
As a man, I feel violated, and not in a good way.
Hate to break it to you girls, but this lady is 100% right.
We men only care about looks until we hit a certain point.
Then we start looking for someone who has as much money as we do.
Unless we have a lot of money, then we never stop going for 20 somethings with big jugs.
LOLOLOLOLOL! I LOVE THIS!!!! SILK SHIRT = RAPE POSSIBILITY = OKAY
This article left out some other good advice, such as, "Let your breats pop out when he stops paying attention" and "Swoon. Swoon! SWOON!"
Phew! For a moment I started thinking men were multi-dimensional beings with, you know, thoughts and feelings and stuff. It's good to know they're just sex-mad morons who can be easily led around by a decent Wonderbra.
Actually this is kind of interesting -- sort of like the "Mystery Method" Pickup-Artistry for women. What we really need, by the way, is a nice "How To Land a Pickup-Artist and Live the Lie You Both Love." I'm sure Dr. Allen would be up to the challenge.
As to whether this is satire or some kind of really horrible jok I'm guessing Allen is dead serious. I sincerely hope the title of this post isn't.
... And I thought the 1950s were over. Silk shirts lead to rape? What nonsense.
You need to get laid lady. Go get a life!
Only harlots ware silk.
If this isn't a joke, this woman needs therapy. Badly.
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