He survived the Nazis as a teenager in France, and he claims to be fiercely proud of his heritage. But on Yom Kippur, in the midst of a litany of forgiveness and atonement, Henry forgot everything that his life might have taught him. During a break in our afternoon liturgy, after hours of contrite and peace-seeking prayers, after all the music and poetry of mercy, this fierce old man defiled everything that filled our temple and defined our mission.
Walking past Henrietta, our brilliant and much-beloved choir director, a classical pianist and conductor, who came to this great country long ago from China, Henry blasted: “You should go back to China!” Never mind that Henry had been singing devotions for literally days that filled the hall poignantly under the artistic direction of this lovely and creative woman who is the heart and soul of our choral group. Never mind that this Asian woman of deep Christian piety knows more Hebrew than Henry and that she, in one of her famous smiling embraces of anyone in the congregation, displays more tenderness than her attacker could even conjure up in his wounded mind.
Never mind that the Jewish tradition is anchored by the following ancient rabbinic command: “What is hateful to you, do not do to any other person.”
Henrietta, dignified, often so funny, with impeccable standards, came to me and broke into tears. She leaned into my white robe and sobbed: “I’m not even wearing my Cross today.” My anguish and pain doubled as I recalled, indeed, that this was not the first time our troubled and misguided congregant had so egregiously assailed this gentle woman.
Months ago, he approached her during a choir rehearsal and incomprehensibly vilified her for wearing her necklace, blurting out unforgivable things about the symbol she wore across her neck. At that time, I personally warned Henry that such blatant bigotry will not be tolerated under any circumstances and that any member of our staff—and indeed anyone at all—who wears the Cross in our congregation is as much a part of God’s family as anyone else.
I admonished him sternly that, while I respect his personal history, the Cross has historically been a sign of peace and that his words and actions only mimicked those who had degenerated the symbol in the name of violence. “Words, too, can kill,” I cautioned the grim man, quoting again from the Jewish tradition.
This gray morning after Yom Kippur, I am so troubled and saddened. Yes, Henry suffered unspeakable things under the Vichy-sponsored detention camp he survived in World War II. But he is free to read from the Torah (as he has) in our blessed America, and his very experiences should inform him viscerally how destructive such wanton prejudice is.
I have to ponder now and decide what to recommend to our temple leadership about Henry’s future in our congregation. What shall I do? How to turn back what one cycle of cruelty has done to nurture a second wave of malice?
One thing for sure: If music has died in one person’s heart, it will still be made by another, so long as I represent the Jewish people.
Comments
you have changed only the names. Henry is still with us and just maybe he has atoned this Yom Kippur too?
RABBI BEN: I WAS NOT AWARE OF YET ANOTHER OUTBURST FROM THIS IDIOT.WE AN EXEC. BD. MTG TOMORROW EVENING IF I HAVE ANY SAY AT ALL, I WILL MOVE FOR HIS EXPULSION.
LET ME SAY TOO, AS A FORMER "SECULAR" JEW, I WAS QUITE MOVED BY YOUR SERMON THE "LAPSED" JEW. YOU KEEP HITTING HOME RUNS. A HEALTHY AND HAPPOY NEW YEAR TO YOU, AUDREY AND ALL YOUR FAMILY.FRANK
Ben, I understand this man is suffering great psychological damage, BUT, his history does not excuse him from responsibility to be a human being and a good jew. I am embarrassed for him. He MUST ask forgiveness of your sweet choral director AND the congragation. His choice: insightful apology, and a behavior change,or,let him go. Life is too short for such negativism.
Rabbi Ben -- beautiful! Too bad you and I know it "really happened". Will I live to see the day when color, race,religious beliefs are not uppermost in one's thoughts? See ya".
Addie
At the conclusion of our Yom Kippur services, I held my dear friend. Her comments about this vicious, uncalled for attack, "I didn't want to say anything to this poor man. He has suffered so much in his life that he cannot drop his hatred of non-Jews". Her kindness is awesome. Her friendship is awesome. Our Temple's responsibility is to make sure his outburst never happens again, just as the Holocaust must never happen again.
Dear Rabbi Ben - It is unfair for the members of our Temple to have to tolerate his outbursts. How do we handle this situation. I thought he got the message after you spoke to him. I cannot understand how someone who has lived thru the holocaust can continue to carry such hatred.
P.S. I am enjoying all of your articles.
"V.P. of everything"
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