Social learning groups teach the “people skills” that so many of us take for granted—the know-how that allows us to say the right thing or to see another person’s point of view. Most of us develop these abilities automatically. But for kids with Asperger's Syndrome, Nonverbal Learning Disorder, ADHD, autism, and sensory integration issues, these skills need to be analyzed, broken down into concrete behaviors, and practiced.
“ Social skills are not hardwired for our population,” says speech and language pathologist Elizabeth Sautter, co-director of the Oakland-based center Communication Works. Sautter and her colleagues offer ongoing weekly groups to help pre-Kindergarteners through teens to understand the unstated rules of social behavior and to read body language and facial expressions. Groups typically include 2-4 students, and parents join in towards the end of each session to learn how to foster new skills at home.
Two very different personality types may benefit from social learning groups. Children who seem shy or quiet may be struggling with social anxiety that can lead to isolation and depression; kids who tend to blurt out whatever comes to mind may be alienating their peers and teachers. Consider a social learning group if your child has difficulty in these areas:
• making friends
• working in groups
• being flexible
• reading the cues of others
• following directions
• feeling empathy
At Communication Works, some groups focus on social language, while others teach social thinking. For children who have a hard time understanding and following directions, social language groups offer play-based activities like Red Light, Green Light or Simon Says. Students learn how to converse with peers and practice asking basic questions and responding appropriately.
In social thinking groups, Sautter and her colleagues integrate the work of author and clinician Michelle Garcia Winner. One important focus is perspective taking—developing the ability to see another person’s point of view. Students practice remembering what they already know about someone or something and bringing this information to a social situation. For example, the awareness that people celebrate the holidays in different ways helps a child to see that the question “What did you do for the holidays?” is a better choice than “Did you light your menorah?”
Sautter speaks of expected or unexpected social behaviors rather than using the terms appropriate and inappropriate. “We’re taking away the judgment,” she says. “Social learning is about trying to set kids up for success.”
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