Starring Kevin Sorbo, Michael Pare & Melissa Ordway
Directed by Albert Pyun
On occasion in the due course of being a critic something comes across this critic’s desk that begs the ultimate question; is this film “So Bad, It’s Good?. Out today from our friends at eOne films is a film that asks that very question. From the director of ‘The Sword & The Sorcerer’ it’s time for “Tales Of An Ancient Empire”.
In “Tales Of An Ancient Empire” swords clash and destinies collide in this story of bloodlust and vengeance. Xia, a demon sorceress has sworn to destroy Queen Ma’at and her kingdom of Abelar. As Xia and her army terrorize the countryside, the Queen dispatches Princess Tanis to find the one man who can stop Xia; Oda a cold blooded mercenary who happens to be the biological father of Tanis. Joined by a thieving rogue named Aeden (Sorbo), Tanis begins her danger filled quest to kill the sister she never knew; a half-human, half-vampire creature determined to kill Oda and conquer the land.
Judging this on the “So Bad, It’s Good” scale; this movie is still a mess. Sometimes in on the joke and sometimes taking itself far too seriously; “Tales Of Ancient Empire” has an overly crowded muddy narrative that takes too long to get there and tries to resolve itself far too quickly only to realize that there is another story still going on. When a bad movie doesn’t know when to end, it simply makes matters worse. The dialogue is stilted and corny, and I have seen better production values in an adult film. Bad movies can be fun, but we were never given the chance and it is no wonder that this film has been on the shelf for four years until it found a release.
Special features include a behind the scenes look with cast interviews.
Ultimately, when you have swords and vampires and scantily clad maidens it usually promises for an entertaining cheesy movie experience but unfortunately “Tales Of Ancient Empire” wasn’t it as it simply didn’t know what it was trying to be and ended up as a fairly unredeemable mess.
On the “So Bad, It’s Good” scale this only rates a 1 out of 5 stars as you still have to be the right kind of bad in order to be good.
“Tales Of An Ancient Empire” is available at video stores across Toronto now; you can click here for a list of some of the finer video stores near you but I am sure you can find something else while you are there.
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