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Snoozefest idea to use model Selita Ebanks on 'Catfish' episode

Selita Ebanks attends the React To Film Awards on May 1, 2014 in New York City.
Photo by Jamie McCarthy

"Bianca and Brogan" episode of "Catfish"

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The biggest appeal of "Catfish" is that each episode is a cross between creepy and funny. And even though MTV chose to incorporate celebrities in the third season, the show hadn't lost its touch. Yaniv "Nev" Schulman and Max Joseph still share the same mix of brotherly love, teasing and geeky detective work.

Even when actress Tracie Thoms went on a search for her own catfish, MTV still stayed close to the format. But for some inexplicable reason, MTV decided to switch up the flow and add former Victoria's Secret model Selita Ebanks as a third wheel on Wed., July 9. On paper, it may seem appealing. Who doesn't want the camera guy to randomly ogle a model for scenes when she's not talking? What if she tried to be as humorous as she was on "Real Husbands of Hollywood (RHOH)"? Why wouldn't a catfish need a third person to take the spotlight off of them on a show focused on figuring out the catfish?

If these three questions all sound stupid, that's because they are and so was the idea to include a celebrity guest for no reason at all who had nothing to do with the show. Here were the eight worst moments in Wednesday night's "Bianca and Brogan" episode.

8. The rationale for bringing her on the show was because Nev met her a couple of weeks ago and she likes the show. If the only requirements are to like watching the show there are a million others who qualify.

7. Selita isn't even sure which car to get in. She spent so much time debating about riding shotgun and ended up in the wrong car. How are you on a detective-like show when you can't even find the right passenger seat?

6. Selita randomly decided to be the author of the "three month representative" dating myth that's been vocalized for years. That advice fell flat when Bianca pointed out in five months that Brogan had never said anything wrong.

5. No matter how many times Selita was told the tattoo said "Sweet Heart" she couldn't get those leg tattoos down.

4. Of course viewers need another show with women calling each other bitches as though it's a synonym for women. No. Not really. Selita was so happy to guess that Brogan was pregnant that she yelled out, "There's only a few reasons why a bitch would go missing." This would be the part where not just Max should've gotten up and left but the rest of the camera crew, too.

3. A conversation with David Spade and Selita aired for no reason at all outside of providing kudos from another person who has no affiliation with the show.

2. Random bitter whining about men kept coming up, including Selita complaining that the reason a girlfriend's photos didn't show up on a social media site are "because he's a guy." Then there was the explanation about how women can talk to each other. Is this "Catfish" or "Girl Code"?

1. The repeated runway walks around the hotel room had absolutely nothing to do with the show. Is this the camera guy's idea again?

Selita seems personable. She carried her own with Kevin Hart on RHOH. Men love her. And she's clearly very accomplished. But what works with "Catfish" is the people playing Who's Who matter more than the hosts. MTV, let the online daters be the ones who call "shotgun" for the rest of the episodes.

Shamontiel is also The Wire Examiner, and for the gladiators, she's the Scandal Examiner, too.

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