For the remainder of the Reaper Bones reviews, Talien AKA Tal (the satyr paladin) and Maleficent AKA Mal (the half-fey/half-fiend sorceress) will review familiars as part of a new series, "That Familiar Show," a sort of fantasy dog show. In this installment, they review Little Death.
Mal: Welcome back to "That Familiar Show." Today we're discussing this little guy.
Tal: Come sit on my lap. What's your name lil guy?
Little Death (LD): Little Death.
Mal: Our first talking familiar. What a refreshing change from talking to you.
Tal: What's wrong with talking to me?
Mal: I think it's self evident. So Little Death, tell us about you?
LD: I'm pretty much what it says on the tin: I'm little, and I look like death.
Tal: Hilarious! So what's that you're holding there?
LD: This? It's a polearm.
Mal: But it's not a scythe.
Mal: A scythe. You're named Little Death. Shouldn't you be wielding a scythe?
LD: A what?
Tal: You know, the Grim Reaper? Reaping souls? With a scythe? Like farmers?
LD: Never heard of it.
Mal: What's up with your name?
LD: What about it?
Tal: Little Death translates to "Little Mort" which translates to something else in French, "la petit morte."
Tal: ...and you know what THAT means.
Mal: Ooooh. Maybe a little dead guy isn't so bad to have around after all.
Tal: Not entirely sure how to classify this guy.
LD: I'm an improved familiar that's undead, neutral evil, and requires a caster level of 7.
Mal: That's awfully high for a little guy like you.
Tal: Got any other powers?
Mal: Wait a minute...
LD: No wait don't lift my hood!
Mal: A kobold zombie?! That explains a lot. Downgraded to caster level 3.
LD: The mystery and the title goes over well with the ladies. Don't tell anybody.
Mal: Zombies can't talk...Tal, get your hand out of that poor kobold zombie's backside!
Tal: Did I mention I know ventriloquism?
You can purchase this miniature at Amazon.
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