After watching director McG’s “3 Days to Kill,” I took a big sigh of relief that I had not spent good money to see this at the theater: And then I realized that I had spent $5.99 for it on Pay-TV.
Ethan Renner (Kevin Costner) is an over-the-hill CIA operative who just wants out of the trade. His career has cost his wife, his daughter, and apparently his health. While Ethan is on a final mission in Europe, he finds out that what he thinks is a bad cold, has been diagnosed as brain cancer. With three to five months to live Ethan now decides that he must make amends with his separated wife (Connie Nielson) and estranged daughter Zoey (Hailee Steinfield), but he is sidetracked when a mysterious blond-wigged woman named Vivi (Amber Heard), who looks like one of the old time “Old Producto” cigar girls, approaches him and offers him a deal: “Kill an arms dealer called “The Wolf,” and I just may have the cure for your cancer.”
Ethan takes the mission, considering that this deal may give him more time to reconcile with his wife and daughter, and now the movie flip flops back and forth as Ethan tracks down the Wolf while attempted to be the good daddy and responsible husband.
This is an extremely irritating movie that has Ethan peddling around Paris on a Barney-purple bicycle that he has bought for his daughter, and then answering her cell phone that has a ring tone belting out “I Don’t Care” as he is about to kill the bad guys. Kevin Costner tries to do his best Clint Eastwood voice imitation while hallucinating on the magic drug he is taking, but whole scene is just kind of stupid. By the way, why would you hire an assassin that is so sick that he can’t even see straight when you could hire a thousand other healthy assassins? Here is some advice: Do not order this on Pay-TV unless you are taking magic drugs.
My Rating: 2 of 5 Hallucinogens.