Life isn't written in stone; the 12 steps of Alcoholics Anonymous are
“It’s a cult!” The justification many newcomers to 12 step programs exhort when family and friends inquire as to why their loved one stops attending “meetings” to assist them in their effort to stop drinking and drugging. Those unfamiliar with the untreated mind of an alcoholic/addict will often spend countless hours pleading, arguing, screaming, and/or withdrawing from the alcoholic/addict in an effort to make them see the error of their ways.
Stop. Don’t pass go! Step away from the edge of disgust and despair.
Disagreeing with an untreated alcoholic/addict is like wrestling a silver back gorilla while restrained in a straightjacket. You’ll never win. Besides, for once, the alcoholic/addict you’re arguing with is correct. Alcoholic Anonymous, Crystal Meth Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, and any 12 step group ending in the word anonymous is indeed, a cult.
Agree with the alcoholic/addict in your life and then invite them to look up the definition of the word “cult”.
In the American Heritage dictionary, cult is defined as “a system of religious worship and ritual.” Great. Now, your alcoholic/addict will likely say something like, ‘see I told you so, I don’t do religion.’ But before you freak out and email me with a nasty comment about what an idiot I was to suggest such a thing, look up the words “religious” and “ritual”.
In the same dictionary, “religious” is defined as “having belief in and reverence for a deity (not necessarily the Almighty God) while the word “ritual” is defined as “a customary or regular procedure.”
So putting it all together, taking out the objectionable term religious, 'a cult is a system of belief in, and reverence for, a deity; where customary or regular procedures are practiced.'
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It’s true, in twelve step meetings the principles of the twelve steps are discussed, a “higher power” of each individual’s choosing is revered and the majority or people in a twelve step meeting are striving to practice the same system, as outlined in the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, to attain sobriety and lead them to create a happy, healthy and productive life.
Now, your alcoholic/addict may still balk at the notion of participating in a cult since it has now been confirmed. Ask them these questions then?
'Are they not beholden to a system of “rules” the drug dealers enforce when they make a buy from them?' For example, an addict can’t tell people who they buy drugs from openly, maybe not at all, for fear the drug dealer will be arrested by an undercover cop. What happens if the “rule” is broken? There are consequences; sometimes a jail sentence or death. This is a type of system of worship and ritual. The drug dealer is revered and protected by the addict.
'Isn’t it a ritual to get off work and immediately crack open a tall, cold one, only to have the drink take hold and then lead you to search out cocaine, crystal meth, or whatever your drug of choice might be?' That’s a customary or regular procedure if you are an alcoholic/addict.
'And what about the power of the drink and drug to prevent an alcoholic/addict from paying their bills on time? Spending quality time with their children? Or holding a job for any length of time?' An untreated alcoholic/ addict worships the drink and drug before anyone or anything else in their life. If an alcoholic/ addict is capable of being honest with themself they’ll see the parallel universe they are living in.
An alcoholic/addict already lives in a cult: a cult of death. So the next time you find yourself faced with a loved one tossing out the old “it’s a cult” excuse for turning away from the twelve step community, try this approach and maybe, just maybe, your alcoholic/addict loved one will see the cult of life facing them in their proverbial mirror.
Comments
Typical AA comment. Only failed alcoholics think AA is a cult. Not true by a long shot. Google AA and cult. See how many results you get. See how many are still sober.
Lisa I appreciate your comment however I'm a sober member of AA and Crystal meth anonymous. It's all in how you choose to view the word "cult". There are good cults and bad cults. For newcomers looking for a reason not to belong to AA, your strict interpretation of what is and what is not accurate would definitely be a reason to run from AA. Let newcomers think what they want as long as they keep coming to meetings. Eventually, their perspective will change. I should know. I was one of the worst offenders when it came to judgment. Now, I'm quite happy to be a part of the cult of life.
Why not look up how much AA functions like a cult before you put pen to paper (or bit to byte), such as googling orange papers As far as Lisa goes, see how many of them are still sober? Well I could bet according to AA's own insider survey there are a lot more of them then there are inside AA, see google George Vaillant and alcoholics anonymous studies
One last thing: 'Isn’t it a ritual to get off work and immediately crack open a tall, cold one, only to have the drink take hold and then lead you to search out cocaine, crystal meth, or whatever your drug of choice might be?' That’s a customary or regular procedure if you are an alcoholic/addict.' No, the drug doesn't lead you. You lead yourself to the drug.
All addiction is a disease of isolation. The first word of the 12 step programs is WE. Think of WE-llness rather than I-llness - the I of Isolation, the of ego, our self separated and fragmented. The alcohol-ISM being I-Self-Me.
Yoga of Recovery integrates the wisdom of Yoga (physical, philosophy and psychology) and Ayurveda with 12 step principles. Encouraging people in recovery toward daily self-care routines and rituals of spiritual connection to re-establish health, self-esteem and self-care. True all addiction involves ritual, the ritualistic self-destruction of the life force. Yoga of Recovery advocates rituals that lead to cumulative self-realization and ultimately self-liberation.
Peace
Durga
www.yogaofrecovery.com
Hello John M. Thank you for your comments. I believe you and I agree on the whole. This article was written in response to a good friend of mine revealing the despair felt when a sibling, who is a heroin addict, quit attending meetings under the guise AA was a cult. My friend wanted to argue how wrong the sibling was and how much the sibling needed to continue going. Cults, in and of themself, are not bad. It's the activity a cult participates in that defines how they should be perceived. When I spoke to my sponsor about my friend's comment, she laughed and quite matter of factly stated AA is a cult but so what? And I can't agree more with her. So what? Human beings are social by nature. To choose to belong to a cult, a group, an entity is all the same thing as far as I'm concerned. If a newcomer wants to call AA a cult fine... there's no point in arguing with them. Simply agree and ask them if they need a ride to their next meeting.
People stop drinking and drugging every day without attending meetings for the rest of their lives, or having to learn a bunch of slogans, or hold hands and pray together. That's the logical step that's missing. Steppers come from the ASSUMPTION that it's either drink or go to AA. Not so. There is also drink or...just stop. Lots of people, lots of "real" alcoholics do it every day. My mother was sober 40 years when she died without ever joining up with AA.
Chayah,
You're quite the Big Book thumper. Take your blinders off and look at the many churches that have non twelve-step recovery programs.
This is really sad. Maybe people who don't care for AA should be taken seriously, and not subjected to a bunch of mental gymnastics to try to get them in the door. It's not as though AA is the only support group or the only path to recovery! Tell the person who doesn't like AA to look up SMART Recovery, SOS, LifeRing or one of the other support groups.
This is horribly silly. No one should be forced to join AA, or any other religion-based quack "cure" for addiction.
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