Cougars may be alone but not lonely

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The women in my cougar community often ask themselves why am I alone? Of course every woman is unique so the reasons vary. But, I would have to say the major reason for being alone is, "I choose to be". 

I recently received an email from one of the members in The Real Cougar Woman Club. She shared her "alone" story with me. Now I will share it with you in her own words.

Being a single parent raising two kids on my own with no help has been tough. Now that my kids are grown and are away for the summer I’ve been forced to deal with the issues that I have been running from or covering up for so long.

I believe that we all make choices in life. I happened to always choose the wrong type of men. They guys were physically attractive on the outside, but with no substance on the inside. They were just empty, hollow and emotionally unavailable.

After giving my choices some very serious thought, I came to realize that I was drawn to the wrong type of men because I had a father who was never there for me. I felt invisible. When I got older I used men in an attempt to validate myself. Of course that was impossible because I hadn't yet learned how to validate myself.

Now that I’m older and wiser I know I deserve better and won’t settle for less than God's best. I’ve come to realize that I really don’t need a man to make me feel good about myself. Why would I? I am an independent, strong, attractive woman in the prime of her life. I am a Real Cougar.

I could have a man in my life now but I am choosing not to. I just turned 44 years old and Idon’t want to waste my valuable time on the wrong things or on the wrong people. 

Will be there room for a man in my life someday? Yes, but on my terms. It's very important that I have people who celebrate who I am. I am done with people who try and bring me down to their level or diminish the woman I was created to be. 

Ladies, life too short to waste on the wrong person.