Local Santa Rosa Pediatrician, Dr. Mark Sloan, encourages us to reflect on the wonders of birth and the journey of parenting as we resolve to begin a healthy New Year.

“Why is this so hard?” asks an awestruck father as his wife labors with their child. Dr. Mark Sloan felt compelled to bring this father - and the world - a better answer than, “It’s a tight squeeze.” His book "Birth Day" explores childbirth from a range of perspectives. From the biology of why humans (versus say gorillas) have such painful childbirth, to the cultural phenomena of how women came to birth lying down, to the science and statistics of pain reduction aids and surgery, to the personal experience of the pressures of being both labor coach and expectant dad, this book provides an in-depth look at the miracle of childbirth.

When asked to further comment on “Why is parenting so hard?” Dr. Sloan affirms that parenting is a tough job. Many of the families in his practice struggle with sleepless nights, fussy babies, baby’s first fevers, mom’s post partum blues, and other general feelings of inadequacy. Dr. Sloan shares that some moms feel inadequate as birthers – they accepted epidurals when they’d planned not to or had cesareans when they’d wanted to have natural births – and this feeling continues as the women become new mothers.

Negative feelings can worsen if women don’t get assistance from doctors, pediatricians, or support groups (see Sonoma County guide here) who can all help normalize some of the difficulties. Dr. Sloan often quips “Bad mothering?” when moms question children's behaviors or issues. His joking stock response is meant to help mothers see through their guilt to normal child development as the source of most "growing pains." Dr. Sloan practices "anticipatory guidance" and strives to alert moms and dads to upcoming changes and challenges. This helps parents adjust expectations and keep up with their child's fast paced development, rather than resorting to self blame or frustration.

A father of two teenagers, Dr. Sloan offers a great model for how reflecting, sharing, and learning about birth and parenting can benefit all of us. Fueled by his passion for finding and sharing wonders, he arose at 4:30 each morning to write the various sections of what became his book “Birth Day.” Sparing himself no shame, he disclosed his own tribulations with the birthing process – including an instance of falling asleep while his wife gave birth to their first child!  Dr. Sloan proves that honesty, humor and compassion unite parents and makes for an engaging read.

Reflect on your own beginnings today by reading Dr. Sloan’s Birth Day, and resolve to strengthen your support networks as you progress on your parenting journey.

(This article is an abridged version of the original featured on www.sono-ma.com. Click here to read the colorful, personalized version.)