.jpg)
Image by blogs.smh.com.au
A first date can be both exciting and stressful. Once decisions like where / when to meet, and what to wear are satisfied, the how will we get along becomes the question. If you are looking for a way to find out what your date thinks of you without having to ask, try decoding their body language.
For the most part, men and women give off similar signs using the same body parts. The main ones are: eyes, hands, head, and torso. There are a few differences, for example, women tend to use their hair as a flirting prop by twirling, flipping, and stroking strands either as a nervous habit or to get attention, while men do not.
Here are some of the shared signals you can use to your advantage during your next date:
EYES:
The “eyes” have it! Most body language experts would agree that the eyes are the most revealing signal for interpreting interest. Even if it’s from across the room, eye contact frequency is always a good sign. A confident person will make prolonged eye contact and usually maintain a steady stare in your direction if attraction exists. Glancing off to the side can mean your date is easily distracted or uninterested. Pupil dilation (larger) usually indicates attentiveness, unless there’s excessive alcohol or drug use.
BODY:
The overall direction of the body can give away most of the story; toward you is good, away from you, not good. The body position will naturally shift during the course of a date, revealing how a person is feeling about you. Frequent shifting can mean that a person is distracted, uncomfortable, or bored. Apprehension is expressed with a “closed” body – sitting rigidly upright with arms crossed. Once trust and comfort is established, a more “open” body posture (uncrossed arms and leaning in) is usually exhibited.
HANDS:
Shaking hands can effectively communicate a level of interest. Firm handshakes are the best, but not to the point of causing pain. Weak handshakes make people feel uneasy and can be an indicator of insecurity or aloofness. Hand gestures play a significant role as they are considered the extension of a person’s words. Appropriately expressive hand gestures can enhance a conversation, but if overly used, can be a turn-off. Hand gestures can also be a helpful prelude to a conversation since they can be interpreted from a distance. Gentle or playful touching is always a positive sign.
HEAD:
Head movement is subtle and quick. Look for the degree of tilt; no tilting / vertical position is negative, too much tilting can be a sign of sympathy or pity, whereas a slight tilt can mean a person is flirting and engaging with you. If there is a downward movement to the head, it could be a sign of shyness, timidity, or shame.
Here are some other useful body language tips:
- If a person mirrors / copies your actions, it’s a genuine sign of interest and means they feel comfortable around you
- Laughing is a positive sign, but not to excess, where it can be a sign of dishonesty
- Gestures such as hair twirling or adjusting eyeglasses can just be signs of nervousness, not necessarily interest
- Personal space should always be respected; err on the side of deference
For more info: Body Language Secrets: A Guide During Courtship & Dating; Everything Body Language Book: Decipher signals, see the signs, and read people's emotions--without a word!, The Definitive Book of Body Language, and Dating and Mating: Reading the Body Language Signals.
Comments