“Courage is fire, and bullying is smoke.” -- Benjamin Disraeli
On March 31st, world renowned psychiatrist, Dr. Alvin F. Poussaint, Professor of Psychiatry, director of Judge Baker Children’s Center at Harvard, co-author of Raising Black Children, expert on children and long time collaborator on bullying issues with actor Bill Cosby was interviewed on MSNBC about the the new student at South Hadley High School, Phoebe Prince, who committed suicide after being continuously bullied by peers on January 14, 2010. Prince was only 15 years old.
For months, Prince was allegedly assaulted, pushed and shoved, called a "slut" and a "whore" and even had soft drink cans thrown at her. Parents are stepping forward after learning that school administrators knew about the bullying and didn’t do anything about it. Parents are demanding more adult accountability for what happened to Prince. In the meantime, two students have been expelled from the school and nine other students will face felony charges in connection with their actions against Prince.
Although one mother is now defending her daughter (one of the accused bullies), stating that Prince was not fully innocent and that, "They're teenagers. They call names," the eight students involved are all being prosecuted. Among the charges against the teens are statutory rape, violation of civil rights, criminal harassment and disturbance of a school assembly. Prosecutors accuse the students of tormenting Prince "relentlessly" online and in school, often in plain sight of school administrators, right up until the day Prince hanged herself.
Dr. Poussaint stated, “Intense harassment and bullying can really drive someone to suicide. Usually those kids feel so victimized, their self esteem is gone, they feel uncared for, unprotected, adults don’t intervene to protect them and they sometimes feel that the only way out of being bullied and pushed around is to kill themselves. It’s very serious and I think that schools need to do much more to intervene; the staff, the teachers, they have to have anti-bullying policies within the schools that have to be enforced, and right now it’s even getting into a state law. Issues around children bullying each other because with bullying, not only is the victim severely damaged, but also it leads to other types of violence when victims retaliate and want to get revenge against those who are picking and pushing them around.”
Dr. Poussaint shared possible reasons why there is so much more bullying now than in generations past:
- Today there seems to be much more acceptance of violence
- There is constant violence in the media
- Violent video games and children seeing hurting others as glamorous and fun
- Social media websites help children to gain easier access to bully, hurt others and let out malevolent feelings
Dr. Poussaint shared some of the reasons children bully others:
- Peer pressure to do what everyone else is doing
- There is a thrill to it
- Bullying may make children feel macho
- Bullying may make children feel dominant and powerful
- Young people who may have low self esteem feel better about themselves by putting down or hurting others
- Young people may have anger issues that are not fully understood
- Young people may unleash their anger and frustrations out on others in order to make themselves feel good and like they are in charge
If you are being bullied by someone or know that someone is being bullied, please talk to a trusted adult about it. People will understand and help. Online counseling is always available at DOCintheBiz if you are feeling depressed, fearful or anxious about being bullied or for any other reason. You are never alone.
Comments
Shame on the parent that says bullying is what teenagers do. You must have been a bully yourself to think this is ok. How can throwing soda cans, pushing, shoving, and name calling be ok for anyone? The socirty we live in today is only out for itself. It doesn't have to respect anyone else. It doesn't have to be kind and do something nice for someone. It's all about me, me, me. Period!!
TO PHOEBE, MAY YOU NOT HAVE DIED IN VAIN?
We’re humane beings! Why can’t we just get along and be civil to one another, and be happy?
BECAUSE, we are humane beings, that’s why, and we are entitled. Anything goes in this great country of ours, from giving ourselves million dollar bonuses to hounding the new kid in school until they kill themselves. Why? Because we can.
I am not defending those punks at all, except to say that their bullying can and was construed as acceptable behavior. The school system was aware of the bullying and did nothing, which is acceptance. At the library, a teacher stood there, observed the bullying, and allowed it to continue. The behavior of that teacher’s indifference by saying and doing nothing is acceptance of bullying behavior. And, with the silent support of indifference from authority, the bullying escalates with apathetic permission.
The adults, the “professionals,” the role models assigned to teach and protect our children committed
Hello everyone last night a classmate of mine committed suicide after school. She was constantly taunted, made fun of the cloths she wore, the way she looked. I am so sadden by this and its crazy because in our setting we are in College. We are all adults and all we keep saying is we are not in high school anymore grow up. This is an issue that is affecting everyone.
there is no reason in the world with all the hype out from teenage suicides because of bullying for administrators to turn a blind eye. The should be prosecuted too.
Bullying is unacceptable. The schools lack of intervention is unacceptable. The parents who turn a blind eye are unacceptable. If this is to stop, there must be penalties and enforcement of the penalty. I do not mean a slap on the wrist!
There are rules that people live by so why can't a school have a rule that when you get hired in for teaching or anything else to do with school that the number one goal is to look after our kids because without them you would'nt even have a job. I think schools are not explaining there insights to what they excpect of everyone that works for them. They need to have people there that care for the kids not people that are there just to get payed for a job. Schools aren't explaining that every kid should be proud of going to the school that they go to and that all kids can be themselves but only be themselves to them and no one else. Everyone is different in there own little way and kids should be tought that so they can understand to see someone for who they are and for who the other person is that they look at in a different way. Consintrate on themselves rather then another person that is just a human as they are. should there be a class in school that helps kids to understand.
Hi Richard,
Well I totally agree with your opinion
There should be a ZERO tolerance policy for bullying in our schools. Kids who bully should be immediately suspended or even expelled for hurting others. What right do they have to torment others? I agree with Richard T. that there should be a class in school to teach kids what is right and what is wrong and the way they should treat others.
horrific and sad that this is the world my kids are going to grow up. I dread the day they enter middle school. It seems to only be getting worse. Maybe home schooling will be an option for that reason alone.
There is a new software called WebSafety out that could've helped prevent this. It is loaded on a cell phone and notifies the parent immediately via text and email if a "cyber-bullying" word or phrase is received on the phone. All our kids need this software. www.mywebsafety.com/dunnllc
I have seen what bullying has done to someone. I used to be bullied when I was young. It really negatively affected me as a youth, and even now as I have a job and am currently dating. The bullying has made me repress so much of myself. I am twenty so I remember high school really well, but what really made my high experience suck was the fact that school officials only picked on me when I caused some minor trouble they really brought the hammer down, but when I was being picked on all of the sudden rules didn't matter and they turned a blind eye, of course everyone I know saw this and told me as well. This bullying happened quite often and no one ever came to my aid. But I got through it by giving them as much trouble as I could. I had to no one ever listened to me. SO I fought back the only way someone like me can. I made trouble. I did everything that wasn't in the book and I made an effort to pester the school in anyway I can.
Isnt suicide a little extreme, im pretty sure a few months of bullying would not make someone end their lives she must have had life long serious problems and this just pushed her over the edge. If the school bullying was the only problem the person would just avoid school or drop out not kill themselves.
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