All credible research says that infidelity is not on the rise, except for a slight upswing in younger women and men over 60. (Watch for documentation in this series.) Therefore, you may want to look for ways to love in your marriage and stop searching for cheater clues.
Here is an example as to why it is so difficult to get authoritative figures and why you can trust these academic researchers — look at the numbers and their comparison figures.
Several years ago (May 2007) two researches did a study to determine:
- Prevalence of infidelity among women*
- Whether or not truth differed from face-to-face interviews versus computer answers
Numbers involved: 4,884 women
Research reported in: Journal of Family Psychology
The findings face-to-face: Just 1 percent of the women admitted to infidelity (1.08%).
Computer findings: The findings when the same question was asked of the women using computer-assisted self-interview (6.13% ). Keep in mind this is one particular population. Across the US the numbers for women are under 3 percent.
The results: When it comes to infidelity, determining the truth is difficult.
The researches: Mark Whisman, PhD, Professor, Department of Psychology, University of Colorado, Boulder and Douglas K. Snyder, PhD Professor, Clinical Psychology, Texas A and M University
What they proposed: “This study’s findings underscore the importance of assessing infidelity with methods such as computer-assisted self-interviews that minimize the influence of social desirability and impression management.” FHA - Sexual infidelity in a national survey of American women
Oftentimes those interviewed answer the question in a way that they think will please the person who is interviewing them!
Note: Prevalence = total number of cases of the infidelity with this population at this specific time.
ABOUT LOVE
Since we do not know many factors set the stage for infidelity at a particular time – husbands should be looking for love signs not infidelity clues. But in the event it happens, consider the forgiveness factor and seek the help of a marriage counselor to save your relationship.
This study is consistent with the NORC findings discussed in the link below.
- Infidelity Fast Facts, Love: fewer than 20 percent ever cheat
- Infidelity: Fast Facts, Love: only 5 percent of men cheat annually
- Infidelity Fast Facts, Love: fewer than 3 percent of women cheat each year
- Infidelity Fast Facts, Love: cheating figures you can trust
NB: Watch for a reprint of my newspaper article that triggered this series.
Rita Watson, MPH, Biography / Rita Watson: Relationships
Follow me on Twitter @ LoveColumnist
Copyright 2010 Rita Watson/ All Rights Reserved
You may use this information with copyright notice or credit and a link back.
Comments
So interesting. I would be curious to know if most of the studies are asking about physical infidelity only or are they also including emotional infidelity. I have also known women who have cheated who do not consider it "cheating" because they justify the infidelity in their minds based on poor treatment by their spouse. Couples who do this seem to be "emotionally divorced" from one another and do not see the infidelity for what it is...
Cheryl brings up an important point in this discussion. Also - I want to acknowledge you for bringing this data out. When large numbers are thrown around, it can lead to a few, non-positive, results. 1) People become overwhelmed - EVERYONE's cheating? Why bother working on my marraige? or 2) Everyone's cheating? I can go have me a little piece of sugar too!. In otherwords, it creates fear and erodes confidence.
Thank you for dispelling myths and bringing some perspective.
Dear Cheryl and Tina:
In this particular study, if they had asked about both physical or emotional infidelity, I believe they would have noted it. Here's why -- they are thorough and even point to early sexual abuse as a factor in infidelity.
They note,"Although many of the predictor variables replicated results from previous studies (e.g., demographic variables, religiosity, sexual experience), findings also indicated that childhood sexual abuse (i.e., forced sex) predicted greater probability of infidelity."
An interesting research question -- do women who were sexually abused at an early age who are poorly treated in marriage feel justified in seeking physical closeness?
The whole topic is pretty overwhelming when you drill down to the facts.
Have more interviews coming up that will hopefully answer your questions.
Happiness and thanks/R
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