Ten predictions for the Lakers and Magic in the NBA Finals

See, the president wants to hear my predictions.
AP Photo/Haraz N. Ghanbari

President Barack Obama recently picked the Los Angeles Lakers to beat the Orlando Magic in six games in this year's NBA Finals.

This is actually more of an endorsement for the Lakers than you would think, since Obama is a huge basketball fan and correctly picked UNC to win the NCAA Tournament this year.

So, following in the footsteps of my bi-racial idol, I decided to put down my own set of predictions about this year's Finals. Please enjoy:

1. The referees will call a flagrant foul on Dwight Howard...before the tip-off. One of the officials will mistake Howard's pregame greeting of Kobe Bryant as "aggressive behavior" and eject him before the game even starts. Of course, two days later, the league will downgrade it to a personal foul.
2. Magic Johnson, covering the Finals for ABC, will optimistically look up from his notes everytime someone says "Magic," only to realize they are talking about the team, not the Laker great.
3. Lamar Odom will take his love of candy to the next level by arriving to games dressed as Johnny Depp in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
4. Stan Van Gundy's voice will reach a frequency so high that his players will no longer be able to understand him. However, there will be several stray dogs waiting for him outside of the arena after the game.
5. Rashard Lewis' goatee will grow a mind of its own and, in the middle of game four, jump off of his face in search of freedom.
6. Nike will purchase a front row seat at every game for the LeBron James puppet...and Howard will "accidentally" throw the ball at it once a game.
7. Former Laker Brian Cook will get re-signed by the Magic and attempt 16 three-pointers in the second quarter of game one in an effort to prove that he has made the trade for Trevor Ariza worthwhile. However, he won't make any and will be released before halftime.
8. The Magic will go up 3 games to 1, and Tracy McGrady will go to the media saying how good it feels for the Magic to have finally won a championship. They will then lose the next three games and the series.
9. Shannon Brown will challenge Dwight Howard to a flying contest...and win.
10. Phil Jackson will win his 10th championship ring, at which time he will officially acheive enlightenment and ascend to the rafters to the sound of Buddhist chants.

And for my one serious prediction...Lakers in seven. Although to be honest, I would rather be right about 1-10.

Want more NBA Finals coverage? Check out my latest podcast where I talk to my good friend and Florida native Patrick Smith about the Orlando Magic.