There are some universally acknowledged truths when it comes to dating. Like urban legends, most of these truths that seem credible are actually myths. The happily ever after often portrayed in romantic films, sitcoms and a friend's rendition of his or her love life only contains a smidgen of accuracy. Every dater wants to believe such stories; nevertheless, our world is full of dating myths. The stories sound like they make sense, but they are full of inaccuracies. In fact, the misinformation spread by these myths keeps many singles from dating productively.
Let's face it, dating does suck. It sucks to be rejected and undoubtedly it sucks to be alone. But the only chance of finding someone special, everyone has to swallow that brave pill and get out and date. Deal with the inevitable rejections, have fun, and learn about the most common dating myths that are plaguing a happily ever after.
When it comes to dating, most people are lead by myths, misinformation, and misconceptions. Understanding and debunking dating myths will leave singles free to flirt, date and more importantly find the relationship they have always wanted.
Now, how many of these myths do you believe? How many have ruined your chances of finding and keeping someone special?
Myth #1: Dating more people will increase one's chances of finding that special someone.
This is, by far, one of the most common dating myths. It is the universal opinion among many singles who have been dating for any period of time. After years of believing this myth, it becomes a way of dating and leads many to a dating burnout. Debunk this myth by doing the opposite. It is better to be very selective when deciding to date. One should only go out with those who seem to be in the category he or she is looking for.
It is always better to date fewer people who seem "right" than to date several people who sound "nice" but will never turn out to be a good match. Dating is not a game; do not treat it as such. So, date with the hope of finding a lifelong partner and not solely as a numbers game.
Myth #2: First impressions of a date are always correct.
It is a common mistake to believe that people are always themselves when they meet someone new. However, this is not the case. Unfortunately, many people form an opinion of someone when first meeting them or on a first date. In the previous two scenarios, an initial date or a second date will seldom take place. One should consider the fact that sometimes people are slow to warm up and might be more comfortable on a second, third or even fourth date. Then, there are those who appear to be charming at first but end up a jerk.
It is always a good practice to remember that it takes time to get to know someone. Anything could take part in their attitude on any particular day. A bad day at work or a personal issue could negatively affect how someone relates to others. So, do not rush to judge someone so harshly and quickly. When first meeting someone and especially on first dates, many people make common mistakes. Some of these include talking too much or not enough, trying too hard to impress their date, or saying the wrong thing. Remember the real essence of a person takes time to surface. This is why it is a good idea to take and make the time to get to know someone.
Myth #3: If people do not click on the first date, they are probably not right for each other.
On a first date, it is indeed possible to get a good sense if someone is not right for you. Common signs are incompatible goals and values, different outlooks of life or no chemistry. However, in most cases it is virtually impossible to make such a definite decision so early on. It generally takes a few dates to realize that there is or might be a connection. If there is an ounce of doubt, give it a second chance. Many couples are happily ever after today just by following this advice.
Particularly, physical attraction by many accounts can hurt someone chances of finding the right mate. Most people have an idealized image of what they want their significant other to look like. If a date does not fit this idealized mold, the dreaded "I'm not interested ..." conversation quickly and prematurely emerge. Instead of ending things before they begin, make the decision to go out with someone a few times to get to know them better. Always remember that there is no such thing as a perfect man or woman. Therefore, searching for your ideal mate will more times than often leave you alone.
Myth #4: If couples date longer, the things that bother each other will work out in the end.
One of the most common dating myths that mislead people is the above. When dating someone, each person must come to terms with the fact that no relationship is completely drama free. When something a partner does is bothersome, make it known. If the issue or issues continue without ever being brought to light, it is probable that it will not ever be resolved. Rest assured, all daters are guilty of letting the small things slide because the overall package is just so right. But taking on this attitude could backfire in the end.
Many daters will have to experience putting up with bothersome things from their mates a few times before they realize the pattern they have put themselves in. When the right person crosses that love path, those issues will either not be noticeable or will be resolved quickly. This should lead a couple to a much smoother courtship.
Myth #5: Love conquers all.
The myth that all things can be worked out if a couple is in love has kept far too many people in unhealthy relationship that lead to ill-suited marriages. If there are problems in the beginning and during, there will be problems in the end. If couple's have fundamental differences, how will they ever sustain a healthy relationship? The problem is that most think any differences and problems faced in the beginning of a dating will work out later. However, it never does. When the problem lies between religious differences and career ambitions, these lifestyle goals are often a part of one's core and are not easily compromised. If these problems remain unresolved, they will become a recurrent source of conflict. Statistics have proven that most unresolved conflicts are a one-way ticket to splitsville.
No matter how much a couple loves each other, love will not conquer their issues. If they do not come to terms with the significant differences in their values or expectations of future dreams, they are probably not going to make it long-term.