Dr. Bill Graybill wrote Resolve Conflict God’s Way to provide step-by-step guidance with practical worksheets, useful tips and online helps that teach Redemptive Management Conflict. It’s a management style that doesn't destroy valuable relationships like “defensive conflict management” does. Instead, Bill’s biblical approach leads to personal, emotional and spiritual healing and restored relationships,
He writes about a church he pastored where he planned to hire an associate pastor and spent a few months mentoring his selection and then decided to delay the hire. The man grew impatient, said Bill abused his leadership authority and retaliated with strife and division that split the church apart. The ensuing confrontation began what Bill describes as a “two-year nightmare of personal and church devastation” that led to this book.
The first chapter explores aspects of conflict and causes that includes personal, religious and even character assassination such as “judging others,” bitterness, fear and mistrust. This chapter includes a simple acrostic—AIM that identifies classic conflict responses:
· Attacks set up a destructive win-lose scenario that can have “devastating long-term consequences” of abuse or legal action.
· Ignore is the most common method that buries conflict and encourages denial and deception.
· Manage with “redemptive conflict resolution,” extends God’s grace, meets with the offended person face-to-face or brings a mediator into the resolution process.
Chapters include scripture and end with self-examination worksheets and bonuses. The bonus in chapter one takes readers online to learn their conflict management style and where they fit in the AIM model: www.billgraybill.com/resolveconflictbonus Other chapters include topics such as prayer, faith, attitudes, anger, responsibility, forgiveness, self-control and more.
Although conflict is inevitable, broken relationships are not. Eugene Peterson endorsed Bills writing as a “must read for every Christian struggling with conflict.” The book is also included on Rick Warren’s leader’s library list.
Dr. Graybill says “…hurt people hurt people…impose their pain on others....” Readers who follow these teachings learn “…restoring relationships is more important than being right… because “bridges of reconciliation” provide better solutions.
I recommend and encourage anyone who struggles with relational conflict to read Resolve Conflict God’s Way. The benefits far outweigh the time and price! Bill is also available as a life coach: www.billgraybill.com/
**For some of Dr. Graybill’s favorite conflict management books
check out “lists” that headlines the review**
‘Resolve Conflict God’s Way’ by Dr. Bill Graybill, BT Johnson Publishing, 2012, 187 Pages, 978-1938311024, $16.95—Kindle Edition, $9.95
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