-This is a disclaimer acknowledging that every Friday from here on out I will provide to you a weeks worth of Horror movies on the rental and VOD circuit. Some of these movies are so bad they will never see the light of day on the main screen but some are hidden gems unknown to the general mainstream moviegoers. I feel it its my duty to make sure you don’t miss out on any future cult classics so I bring to you my weekly installment of Horror Movies Uncut. The thoughts and opinions on these reviews are clearly my own and should be shared by many!
BEST PICK OF THE WEEK
The East Enders found in London also have the nickname Cockney. It refers to the area they are from and in a sense the language they have created. You are very familiar with these blokes as you have seen most of them in films like Snatch and Rocknrolla. Take the pace of those films and add in slow movie zombies and there you have it. The comparisons of this and Shaun of The Dead will grow tiresome but this film stands alone in many ways. First the humor is different and lot more brutal. Second the back and forth between what's going on with the boys and what's going on with old folks at the retirement home could have been two different films which I enjoyed the most about the feature. It’s downright evil how funny this film is as they really push the envelope with Cockneys. The walker scene is worth the rental by itself. So if you are sick of zombies in love or don’t need to see zombies taking the world over I think you will find Cockneys vs Zombies a nice little treat. 3/5
THE REST OF THE FILMS
Read my official review of Lords here. I was very pleaseed with the effort of not only Rob but Sherri Moon Zombie. This film is very polarizing as many either loved or hated the movie. It took me a few days to sleep on it but I really liked it. Its a very disturbing film that had an almost Kubrick Esque feel to it. It was hard not to make Lords the pick of the week but after mulling over it the past week I could not do it. The movie is just too strange and too out there for the masses. I hope many of you guys give this a chance and have an open mind. This film will be a cult classic for sure. There is not a ton of violence in the film because its more about the overall tone. In regards to witchcraft lore it is a very smart film and I commend Zombie for approaching the topic in that way. When I first heard about the Lords and the premise I thought what is he doing here. As I walked out of the theater I knew I just watched something special. 3/5
This weeks VOD pick is the film Hell Baby. I've been anxiously awaiting this film and unfortunately it did not live up to the hype. Don’t get me wrong I love the crew from Reno 911! and when I saw the creators were making this film, I thought well at least it will be funny. Soon after it started I thought to myself this movie is nowhere near close to being funny. I love the cast I really do but the movie just fell flat. I felt like I was watching a Scary Movie or some other parody then the actual film. Hell Baby's story was funny in regards to the premise but the execution fell flat. Story involves a young couple played by Rob Corddry and Leslie Bibb who have just moved into a new house in New Orleans and their unborn baby has become possessed. It hurts that by the time you see the baby you are done with the film. Overall Hell Baby looks great and i’m curious to my reactions on second watch but for now you may want to pass on this. This was suppose to be a comedy with horror elements but for now it’s just horrible. 1/5
*available now on all VOD outlets
PUPPET MASTER VS DEMONIC TOYS-
If this film does not sound familiar its OK. It was a made for TV movie that aired on Syfy back in 2004. I’m glad to see this come to DVD because its not a bad film by any means and really explains what was behind all the puppet master movies. Not saying this film is as intense as its beloved Full Moon releases but it carries it’s own weight. Its funny seeing Corey Feldman in a fatherly role but hey it was 2004. The film is about Feldman as the nephew of the great toy maker who has found his love for toys. He brings his uncles creations back to life but has been observed by a wealthy toy maker who wants what he has. The toy maker makes a deal with a demon to bring toys back from hell and they fight against Toulon’s creations. Its a crossover film which we rarely see in horror movies . If you are a fan of the franchise this is a must see but many will pass this up in the mainstream. Its not that bad and is very entertaining so why not give it a try. 2/5
Unless noted you can find these films at all Family Video Locations.