For the first time since 1990 all three college football powers will take to the road this weekend. That's BYU, Utah and Utah State in case you didn't know. Now that you do, you should also know that all three teams face decent, but not great opponents.
BYU travels to Reliant Stadium to take on undefeated Houston but the UH Cougars record should come with an asterisk next to it -- because they haven't played anybody good.
Utah travels to the desert to face Arizona, a team that got spanked at USC last week in the "Go Away You Stupid Idiot Lane Kiffin" game. The Wildcats made it close but close doesn't count unless you're playing with horseshoes and hand grenades.
Trojan fans probably wished for grenades when Kiffin was stumbling around their sidelines in his all-white weirdo warmups, but since he isn't all is well -- for now -- in La La Land, until they lose (like on Saturday). Utah is of course coming off of the ultimate victory against Stanford. You already know this.
And Utah State begins the Darell Garretson era Saturday in Albuquerque. If you're wondering who Darell Garretson is, you're not alone. If you're wondering where Albuquerque is, take a left once you get to the giant mesa and go east until you see nothing (like Wyoming without the blinding snowstorms and inedible truck stop food).
In fact, I don't know many Aggies fans who know who Darell Garretson is -- but rest assured, it only takes 0.0002 seconds for the crack media relations team at USU to tell you why his first name is only spelled with one R instead of two. (Whatever you do, do NOT give them your email address or you'll be sorry...)
And then there's the Utah Jazz. Ah, our beloved Jazz have fallen and can't get up this preseason. First, Trey Burke broke his right index finger so loudly my parents in Magna could hear it pop -- even over the roar of top-fuel funny cars shaking their house down to its very foundation.
It was the sound that shook a state, reverberating through the valley like a Donny Osmond song -- if a Donny Osmond song was grotesque and dark, and it most assuredly is not, so shut up.
And guess what? We're about to predict it all, the "Believer" with his beliefs and the "Non-Believer" with his, uh, not so much faith in anything. Let's get it on! (Uh, wrong choice of words for this audience...) I mean, here are the predictions!