Few egos in today’s society, celebrity or otherwise, are able to rival those of Kim Kardashian and Kanye West, and by the grace of all things wonderful they are to be wed in a union that will create one huge glorious super ego. We can’t wait to see what awesomely bad moments, photos and quotes this marriage is sure to spawn. In fact we’re so excited about this wealth of opportunity that we’ve compiled a list of some of Kim and Kanye’s best (or worst depending on who you ask) moments so far.
From astounding arrogance to baffling quotes, these two have filled our lives with reasons to stay in school and to keep working hard in the name of the betterment of humanity. And doesn’t that motivation make Kim and Kanye the most important and significant heroes of modern times? Everyday they seem to give us something new to cringe at and something new to strive away from being. It takes a very special kind of intelligence to realize you’re not serving as an example but rather more of a warning to today’s youth. Neither Kim nor Kanye posses this intelligence, allowing them to continue their hilariously dumb antics and show us all what it means to have reached a level of enlightened obliviousness that the rest of us can only dream of achieving. So take a few minutes away from Yeezus and ‘Keeping Up with the Kardashians’ to check out this list of ten of Kimye’s best moments so far.
Kanye's thoughts on OJ Simpson
"O.J. Simpson, amazing. Is he not? What he did, when he did, what he did. Was he not amazing though?"
Yes, Kanye West is quoted as having said that O.J. Simpson, the NFL player most famous for the alleged murder of his wife and another man, is amazing. Perhaps what’s worse is that Kanye says it in a form of a question, as if everyone agrees that yes, O.J. Simpson is indeed amazing.
Kim's 72 hour marriage
Kim's 72 hour marriage to Kris Humphries also known as the wedding that made Kim K. around $20 Million through broadcasting rights, sponsorships and merchandising. Raising the question, did she really just marry him for the limelight? And how many of us would really be surprised if she did? Kim was married to Kris Humphries for a whopping 72 hours before she filed for divorce proving that there really isn’t much to be said for the sanctity of marriage these days.
Kanye vs Taylor Swift
One of Kanye’s most infamous moments occurred at the 2009 MTV VMAs when Taylor Swift won the award for Best Female Video and beat out Beyonce. Just as Taylor was about to accept her award Kanye snatched the mic and went on rant while the rest of the world watched on in mild horror. Luckily, there are no hard feelings between the two musicians as they’ve reportedly become friends since that fateful night.
Kim Kardashian's tweets
If you were worried that Kim K. wasn’t making enough money for little to no effort, well you can rest easy. As of 2009 Kim makes $10,000 per tweet through endorsements, and that was before her larger than life fame really blew up. So we can only imagine what her 140 character pearls of wisdom are raking in these days.
Kanye feels like Hitler
Kanye is usually the first to cry victim but more often than not he tends to leave the brutal murders of over six million people out of his convictions. Not this time though. At a concert in Herefordshire, England he stopped the show to discuss how he’d recently been ‘unfairly’ branded as a misogynist and went on to say “I walk down the street, and people look at me like I’m f—ing insane,” he explained. “Like I’m Hitler.” Seconds afterward the whole of Europe let out a collective annoyed sigh.
Kim Kardashian's Mastercard Scam
No one ever said the Kardashians were famous for their brains and rightfully so. The Kardashian clan were more than willing to put their names on credit card by Mastercard but turns out they were a little too hasty. Kim and her brood failed to read into anything about the credit card aimed at America’s young people and found themselves in the midst of what many financial advisors would call a scam. The card had so many hidden fees attached to it that it made the card illegal. Mastercard did end up pulling it from the market, but not before Saturday Night Live and the rest of the country got ahold of the Kardashian ‘Scamstercard’ story.
Kanye on Responsibilty
“I hate when I’m on a flight and I wake up with a water bottle next to me like oh great now I gotta be responsible for this water bottle”
Kanye has brought us on an amazing journey of Twitter ridiculousness but this is the Tweet that lives in infamy. A fantastic view into Kanye’s thoughts on responsibility and his thoughts on flight service. This Tweet lives in all our hearts because who wants to deal with an inanimate object that materialized out of nowhere?
Kim sues Old Navy
A word of caution to all working models and actresses with brown hair: Kim K. might sue your employer. Kim sued the clothing retailer Old Navy because their ad featured a model who had ‘long dark brown hair’ and Kim felt the model looked too much like her. Because if Kim isn’t being paid to look good then no one gets to be paid to look good.
Kim stops a comdian from doing his job
The E! Network is home to all the Kardashians but it’s also home to the comedy clip show ‘The Soup’ hosted by Joel McHale. McHale is required to update viewers on the antics of the Kardashian family and he always does it in his usual satirical fashion. A fashion that rubbed Kim the wrong way. After complaining to E!, Joel McHale is no longer allowed to make jokes about Kim or the rest of the family. Let’s rephrase that: A comedian is no longer allowed to make jokes.
The first Kimye music video of many
The Kimye music video...you know the one.
Earlier this year Kanye showed us all that just because your fiancée is beautiful doesn’t mean she can act. Or appear in a music video without appearing extremely awkward and ridiculous. One of Kanye’s only redeeming traits is that he’s a pretty good lyricist and singer and his music videos aren’t usually terrible. So why mess with a good thing, Kanye? We know you’re sweet on Kim, but the only reason you should ever include her in another one of your videos is to spawn another parody from Seth Rogan and James Franco.