Adopting as a single parent

 

Mary thought she had things covered for herself and her daughter, Nina. She didn’t plan on terminal cancer.

As an African-American single mom, Mary faced and dealt with the disadvantages that such a position could bring, but she was losing the battle with cancer. Her time was short.

Nancy, a Caucasian acquaintance, asked Mary to move into her home to make Mary and Nina’s life easier. Nancy was friendly and kind, but too old to adopt nine year old Nina. Nancy set about the business of helping Mary find a family for Nina. She called almost everyone she knew to discuss possibilities and suggestions.

Again and again, friends kept asking about Melinda. “Mel,” as everyone called her, was in her early forties, a vibrant single African-American woman with a great sense of humor. Would she adopt Nina? Would she literally turn her life upside down for someone else; particulary a stranger?

Single parents adopting children isn’t as unusual as it used to be. For whatever reason a child cannot be raised by his or her biological family, the Social Service System, at least in Southern California, was formed to seek out the best possible options for the child. Placing a child in a loving environment with just one parent is better than no parents at all.

Many adoptive single moms and dads are choosing to make a difference in this world, especially in the life of a child. Most Adoption Agencies welcome single parent applications. There are numerous programs to assist the parents in raising their children to adulthood.

The call was made. The women met and immediately liked each other. Mel and Nina bonded as well. In the months that remained, the legal papers where drawn up, arrangements made and Mary died knowing Nina would be loved and have a good life.

As the years went by, Mel took the parenting job very seriously. She still laughed often and deeply, but Nina was her primary concern. She wasn’t as spontaneous as she once was, but the trade-off was that she now had a daughter, a family! If you asked Mel, she would tell you that she is rich beyond her wildest dreams!

(Names were changed out of respect for the privacy of the individuals)