How cheating men use the gym or health club as an excuse to cover up their affair

"Going to the gym to work out" is a common excuse used by
cheating men to cover up their affair.
Photo: istockphoto.com/ Alex Gumerov

“Going to the gym” is one of the two most popular excuses used by cheating husbands and cheating boyfriends, to cover up the time they spend with the Other Woman, when they are having an affair. See 5 Common Excuses Cheating Men Use to See Their Mistresses

There are several scenarios which involve going, or pretending to go to the gym or health club, which can buy a cheating man at least 2 or 3 hours with the woman he’s cheating with.

NOTE: The New York Post recently reported that Grammy- award winning singer Bruce Springsteen was involved in a 4-year affair with a woman which originated and was facilitated by working out at a “high –priced Jersey Shore gym.” The woman’s marriage ended in a bitter divorce which was finalized this week.

Below are a few of the ways cheating men have been known to use the gym or health club as an aid to infidelity, or to cover up an affair. Following this are several ways you can check out his story out to see if he’s being truthful when he tells you he’s going to “work out.”

Gym Cover-Ups Cheating Men Use

• He may say he’s going to the gym, but instead go to his mistress’s place or to a nearby hotel.

• He may have his mistress pick him up after a brief workout at the gym.

• He may drive to the gym, leave his car in the parking lot, and have his mistress pick him up in her car.

• He and his mistress may make out, or have a quickie right there in the parking lot.

• He and his mistress could workout together before going to her place, or going their separate ways

These are just a few of the ways the gym /health club scenario could unfold.

Carrie’s Story

Carrie found out quite by accident that Fred was just using the gym as an excuse. Three nights a week, Fred would leave home with his gym bag and return home freshly showered 3 hours later.

One weekend while sorting laundry, Carrie checked Fred’s gym bag. Instead of the smelly, sweaty, rumpled tee shirt and shorts she expected to find, the workout clothes Fred supposedly had been wearing all week, were clean, neatly folded and obviously unworn.

Marla’s Story

Marla’s cousin told her she thought she saw Marla’s husband Artie going into a motel with another woman last week. The time coincided with the time Artie had told his wife he was going to workout at the gym.

The next time Artie said he was going to the gym, Marla waited 20 minutes, then drove to the gym in her own car to see for herself if Artie was there. Sure enough, Artie’s car was in the parking lot . Marla started to leave, but something told her to go inside to see if Artie was actually there. She did -- and Artie was nowhere to be found. After several attempts fo reach Artie on his cell phone, Marla sat in her car fuming, determined to see when Artie would show up. Almost 2 hours later, a car drove into the parking lot, and Artie got out.

How to Check out the “Gym” Excuse

Sometimes “going to the gym” can be a legitimate excuse.

Since you don’t want to falsely accuse your husband or boyfriend of lying to you if he actually is going to the gym to workout, below are several ways you can check whether or not he’s telling you the truth.

• Get a guest pass and show up unannounced one day.

• Visit his gym or health club at a time he claims to be there. Tell the person at the front desk that you’re considering a membership, and ask for a tour. If you don’t see him anywhere on the premises during your tour, you’ve found out what you want to know.

• Wait outside the gym and see who he leaves with.

• Ask a friend to go inside and check to see if he’s there, and if so, who he’s with.

• Check out his physique. It should be improving in some way. If he’s regularly “going to the gym” and there are no visible changes, something is wrong.

• When he comes home, ask him how his workout went. Inquire about how many reps, or which weights, or which equipment he’s using now. Ask him what kind of workout he does - whether or not he uses a trainer, or any other legitimate question that comes to mind. How does he react to your questions? Defensiveness is a sign that something could be going on. Does he lie? Beat around the bush? Is he at a loss for words?

• Join the same health club and workout together and you’ll know, for sure what’s going on.

Why You Should Check Out his story from Time to Time

Even if his story checks out, and your husband or boyfriend really is working out at the gym, it’s still a good idea to check things out from time to time.

You might want to periodically do one or more of the things on the list above, just to be sure. Especially since many a cheating man has started an affair with someone he met at the gym.

Singer Bruce Springsteen allegedly met and struck up a friendship with the Anne Kelly, a wealthy housewife, at an upscale New Jersey health club. Rumor has it that their friendship progressed to lunches together, and eventually turned into a 4-year affair which led to Kelly’s divorce this month.

Stay on top of the situation if your husband or boyfriend is a regular at the health club or gym. Otherwise, this could happen to you.

Other Excuses Cheating Men Use

“Working out at the gym” is one of most common excuses cheating men use to cover up their infidelity. But there are numerous other excuses men use to get away from their wives or girlfriends so they can cheat, or to keep them from knowing where they’ve really been. See 5 Common Excuses Cheating Men Use to See Their Mistresses and How Cheating Men Use Business Travel to Hide Their Affairs

In Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs, the chapter on Absences lists 39 signs of infidelity that should arouse your suspicion when your man is “missing in action.” Is He Cheating on You? contains 21 major categories of infidelity signs.

For a free tip sheet which describes the 21 categories of infidelity signs, e-mail InfidelityInfo@gmail.com with 21 categories – Xm in the subject line.

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Ruth Houston is a New York-based infidelity expert who is frequently called on by the media to comment on high profile infidelity and popular infidelity issues in the news. She is the author of Is He Cheating on You? - 829 Telltale Signs, the founder of www.InfidelityAdvice.com and publishes the Infidelity News and Views blog. To interview infidelity expert Ruth Houston, or have her conduct a seminar, or speak at an event, call 718 592-6029 or e-mail InfidelityExpert@gmail.com

For more information about infidelity, excuses cheating men use, and extramarital affairs, see:

5 Common Excuses Cheating Men Use to See Their Mistresses

Business travel and infidelity - how cheating men use business travel to hide their affairs

8 Ways Cheaters Give Themselves Away by Trying to Cover Their Tracks

Why Most Cheaters Don’t Get Caught

What Should I Do If I Think He or She is Cheating on Me?

21 Categories of Infidelity Signs (free tip sheet)

Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs (softcover book)

Is He Cheating on You? – 829 Telltale Signs (e-book version with Affair Recovery information)

Free Infidelity Tip Sheets and Special Reports

Infidelity Resources to Help You Catch a Cheating Mate