Students at the University of Colorado are being told by campus police that their planned game of "Humans vs. Zombies" must be canceled because of a campus ban on toys that look like guns.
The planned game would divide participants into "humans" and "zombies" with the human team defending themselves with NERF guns. Campus police "[fear] they could be painted to look like a real weapon and someone could become alarmed and notify authorities, who would have to respond."
"If we have people playing a game and someone happens to be walking and sees someone crouched down with something that looks like a weapon, then they call us, we're going to respond," said campus police spokesman Mollie Bosley.
It would seem that a simpler solution would be to prohibit painting toy guns to resemble real guns, though from the look of the NERF guns on that company's website, it would take quite a stretch of the imagination to mistake one of these toys for an actual firearm. However, it would appear that the overreacting "zero tolerance" mindset is going to win out.
What's next? Are they going to ban "hide-and-seek" because someone might suspect foul play? Ban "tag" because it might be mistaken for an attempted assault?
That's the society we live in now, though. Every attempt is made to sterilize the learning environment and people are encouraged to report anything and everything that might seem the slightest bit suspicious with no use of common sense as a filtering mechanism. This is what leads to "man with a gun" calls to police simply because a person is walking their dog down the street while legally carrying a firearm in a holster without a shred of suspicious behavior.
The organizers of the zombie game have allegedly been threatened with expulsion and are asking participants to use socks as weapons if they want to play the game. Campus police might want to think about banning those because someone "might" put a rock in there...
Comments
Perhaps the campus police should carry nerf guns. If they need to draw down on a criminal, he'll certainly mistake it for a real gun.
Btw, why are campus police ordering a stop to an event? Would this event actually violate a law, or are the police claiming dictatorial authority?
Well the games could still commence using as weapons campus police or water filled douche bags with high velocity nozzles. I suppose if they used the latter they would need to label them so the weapon could not be confused with the campus police.
Might I please call this a hyperhypothetical? I'll try to break it down reasonably, and then we can count the conditionals: "If we have people playing a game and someone happens to be walking and sees someone crouched down with something that looks like a weapon, then they call us, we're going to respond," said campus police spokesman Mollie Bosley.
IF there are people. IF they're playing a game. IF someone's walking. IF someone's crouching down. IF the one crouching down is holding something. IF that looks like a weapon. IF the walking person sees it. IF the person who sees it calls the campus police. Then the CSU SWAT team will CERTAINLY respond.
That makes eight, count 'em, conditions that must be met. When I read this back to myself, I hear the continuing plaint of the anti-gun, Brady-leaning crowd in its seemingly eternal search for an unlikely circumstance to occur that proves no one should ever possess a firearm.
I think this overlooks the feelings of zombies, who might not appreciate the idea that students are being taught to hunt them.
This kind of insensitivity is NOT what we need on our campuses!
Where's the diversity?
It become more obvious with each incident like the above that "zero tolerance" is the the wrong term. It should be, instead, "zero intelligence". If the trend continues, the answer to the great question, "Is there intelligent life on Earth?", will soon become painfully obvious:
"Not any more."
boo u
you ned to look at www.nerf.com
o FU
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