Layers. I have learned to love to wear them. It took just one year in Minneapolis to quickly appreciate the art of layering clothes in the winter, spring summer and fall.
I love to eat them. An EnglishTrifle is my idea of a food group. Layers of vanilla creme pastry, pound cake, fresh fruit, more creme! Creme! Cream! Dreaming of layers of deliciousness!
Layers of blankets. Again, winter, spring, summer or fall, under the down comforter I crawl with pillows and the air conditioner and the fan and this is an area my carbon footprint swells. I love my blankets!
And, friendship. Okay, let's get to business here. Having work friends, school friends, past friends, current friends, old friends, casual friends, club friends, online friends, close friends, and then there are the acquaintances. How does one juggle these layers without making a delicious disaster somewhere? With the advent of Facebook, MySpace, Twitter plus regular old real time living, it seems trying to balance all of these relationships can be downright dizzying. And, where does one draw the line? What do you do when the mother of your 3rd grade classmate wants to be your online friend? Really. Honestly. Truly. (There are 614,000 results on Google for "layers of friendship" so I must not be the only one dealing with this onion of emotion)
Who is the expert of all of this? I don't know so I asked my Grandmother. She's a 4'10 inches, 90 lbs of Sicilian-American bundle of love and wisdom. When in doubt, turn to someone older, wiser and who can put things into perspective.
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Me: Hi Grandma
Grandma: Hi Debbie (what can I say, I will always be a little Debbie to her)
Me: Gram, I have too many friends, what do I do?
Gram: Mine are all dead.
Me: Oh, I'm sorry.
Gram: So, what is the problem?
Me: Everyone wants to be my friend
Gram: Well, Debbie, you are so nice. Again, what is the problem?
Me: On the computer, so many people are asking to be my friend and ...
Gram: Do you know I haven't talked to anyone in three days? It is nice to hear your voice.
Me: So, what do you think I should do?
Gram: Well, unplug the computer and go for a walk. I wish I could go for a walk but my knee is....
Grandma: Hi Debbie (what can I say, I will always be a little Debbie to her)
Me: Gram, I have too many friends, what do I do?
Gram: Mine are all dead.
Me: Oh, I'm sorry.
Gram: So, what is the problem?
Me: Everyone wants to be my friend
Gram: Well, Debbie, you are so nice. Again, what is the problem?
Me: On the computer, so many people are asking to be my friend and ...
Gram: Do you know I haven't talked to anyone in three days? It is nice to hear your voice.
Me: So, what do you think I should do?
Gram: Well, unplug the computer and go for a walk. I wish I could go for a walk but my knee is....
That's the advice I'll take. Maybe I'll just walk away from the computer for a while and let some relationships just happen the old fashioned way. One walk and conversation at a time. And, if I am lucky, I'll have dozens of notifications awaiting me when I log in later.
What do you do with all of your layers of relationships? Drop a line and share your thoughts at balzertalk@gmail.com
Comments
"Onion of emotion" I love it!
And yes, sometimes, wouldN'T it be easier to go back to the days before call-waiting, caller ID, facebook, myspace, instant messages. When people sent letters and cards just "because". I think that as I scramble around in a panic for my cell phone and hope I remembered to charge it last night. You know, in case I want to go on a mad text messaging voyage today!
I love how your grandma put it all in perspective. Too many friends indeed!
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